Alec

A photo of a sign, white text on red background: JESUS... WHO IS HE? WHY DID HE COME?

When I arrive at the party

What's making us happy this week: denial

they should always let this happen

oh, man, that will unhease you right away

It's not a phase, I'm eternally always in unfiltered gremlin mode.

lying around with covid. again again

The BNF chat really converted you, huh?

My 2025 Bingo Card. Surprise T. Swift album is now crossed out.

This isn’t really what I meant by “Surprise T. Swift Album” but people do seem pretty surprised, so I’ll take it.

According to the CDC that has gone up to 178,000

Dam been writing a book about this and she just TikToked it in 90 seconds.

This is why I jog. I have to physically ditch them.

A classic Garfield panel where where the text is replaced with a Trump quote.

A large yellow warning road sign that reads "Joy Diversion"

Roadworks will tear us apart, again

The cover to the 1999 Weird Al album "Running With Scissors". Al is running on an athletic track while holding up two pairs of scissors. He has a crazed look in his eyes.

only if consumed within the first 5 minutes of the movie

idk, I got that bad ending. I should probably go back.

Can't believe Lindsay didn't bring that one to your attention sooner.

[puts playlist on shuffle] gonna listen to Milli Vanilli willy-nilly.

Gently Used Eyes

The slushie machine has a color you don't recognize, swirling around through the glass, your mesmerized brain struggling to make sense of what's hitting your retinas, like the wavelength of the light itself is being bent and corkscrewed on the way to your eye. You bet it tastes like strawberries

(that is an ancient Allan Sherman joke)

When you go to Salt Lake,
And you see Mrs. Blake,
That's a Mormon.

YouTube video by HayleyWilliamsVEVO Hayley Williams - Ego Death At A Bachelorette Party (Official Video)

@ownsongkaraoke.bsky.social hot off the press: youtu.be/Bw72CQYfHvY

it's heartbreaking to see so many people becoming homeless due to their treatment-resistant addictions to housing, groceries, and health care

I've been crying more than I piss.

misread that as "french the llama" questions

I’m petrified about today’s science news. Genetically modifying crabs to have cheetah genes? This could go sideways fast.

‪I need @protonjon.bsky.social‬ to stream this immediately.

all these fireworks are really making me feel like a plastic bag

Sign that says “waste connections”

Too ugly for tinder so now I’m on