Michael Kelminson

If you're a professor at Texas A&M, you'll need to receive written authorization from the university president before discussing this incident on campus.

"Sonny Jurgensen, is he still playing for Washington?"

He did the "I, state you name" bit from Animal House. After all these years I still can't believe this country is run by such a colossal dumbass.

That's what happens when you have to put your lipstick on in the dark.

He's jealous that someone else is getting all the attention.

His brain no more work so goodly.

There are more of us than there are of them.

A SSRS/CNN poll showing 61% people think Trump has gone too far using the power of the presidency and 57% think he's gone too far deporting immigrants.

People fucking hate this guy. They fucking hate ICE. They fucking hate how much power he has. He is at 63% overall disapproval to 37% approval. That's lower than their poll after January 6th. And this poll was done before he started intentionally starving people. I wish our media would reflect this.

This is the ultimate "don't threaten me with a good time."

"When you're a major league manager they let you do it. You can do anything....grab 'em by the nipples."

I mean they've got a pretty explosive offensive with Jokic. 33 isn't out of the ordinary.

I don't know what's worse, "appeared to be" or "brown liquid"? You don't have you say shit or poop but excrement works.

Listen, Jason Garrett wasn't the greatest coach in the world but this is mean.

It's Brewster's Millions but he has to stop a new war every day. Sounds very realistic.

A. They were adults
B. Even If they were "just kids" if you can't condemn them for loving Hitler you are a the worst kind of human imaginable, but we knew that about JD already.

Civil Rights Lawyer Bryan Stevenson on How America’s Story Should Be Told

Cause the algorithms are increasingly shady and I don’t see much promotion, let me Gift Link this:

www.nytimes.com/2025/10/08/u...

He's about to go undercover to infiltrate Bill Swerski's Super Fans.

They're just here to sell citizens of Springfield that a monorail will transform the city.

If the 49ers win the coin toss he'll have no choice but to kill Batman.

Was it between this and Subprime Stadium?

Congrats!

the president of the united states wants to use the american military to kill american citizens on american soil. that's the whole story!

"While many of you are saying go Trojans or go Illini, I'm saying go Lightning, please strike Dave Portnoy."

lol this man said "let me tell you about the airplane secrets of an entirely different airplane"

We are so close to the official government position being “actually the genocide of Native Americans was a good thing”.

I would use "I did Nazi this coming" joke but come on everybody saw this coming.

I knew it, Mr. Met.

Pretty sure “Nazi” is directed at the masked street thugs disappearing people on the street, the people running literal concentration camps, and the people who are proud white supremacists advocating fascism and not “everybody who disagrees with you”

But very good job defaming your opponents, sir

Silly me all this time thinking success in sports is dictated by winning games when it’s actually whatever the idiot billionaire tell us it is.

Kimmel: "This show is not important. What is important is that we get to live in a country that allows us to have a show like this."