Gwared, Brazda & Seel - Comin' Atcha

Teabag removal is a class signifier.

Aw, can your posh fancy fingers not handle a hot teabag?

Wait... SHE'S REAL

America has made the world cup draw both needlessly complicated and extremely cheap.

Very on-brand.

America have turned the World Cup Draw into a really fucking terrible hour of Sport Relief. I swear Corden is going to turn up. I can feel it in my liver.

NONE of them were interested in football before Ted Lasso.

None of them.

I feel like I'm high.

Why are Americans at the World Cup draw all talking like they invented football?

What the fuck is going on?

a woman sitting in a chair with her hand on her face and the words oh that 's so sad below her ALT: a woman sitting in a chair with her hand on her face and the words oh that 's so sad below her

My face watching Lauryn Hill doing Doo Wop (That Thing) at the World Cup draw.

A Deutsche Welle X post reading 'Germany’s parliament has approved a new military service model. From 2027, all 18 year-old males must report for inspection. Military service remains voluntary but if the required number of recruits is not met, a so-called ‘needs-based conscription’ could apply.'

Uhm, lads, Germany is at it again...

I know she doesn't exist in reality and is a narrative vehicle for discussing infidelity and communication with the other person but...

The way I fucking hate Madeleine is unreal. I hate her. I want her life to be horrible. She's *awful*.

Get a matte top coat if you just want them to be loss glossy and flashy.

Or the Sally Hensen matte colours are cool af.

Having some tea because there's a giant dick coming to visit and I need my throat to be all warm and relaxed.

Thinking I got some time off work and then Taylor Schabusiness goes and behaves like a fool in prison.

Grindr marked this picture of me as full frontal nudity… and I’m genuinely very confused how a small part of my hip and Birdo from Mario look like a penis

Oh I'm sure I'd find a way to manage.

come here next time

From some studies I did at work years ago we were able to demonstrate that an Alzheimer's drug suspended in a gel was able to regrow internal tooth structures and then, out of nowhere, that entire research branch got cut off.

Or travel back in time and murder Jeff Lynne.

Guys, he's had wine and is about to blast ELO on the table.

Send help.

Lily Allen's Alright, Still has some proper fkn bars on it.

Haven't listened to it an age and it's still a cracker of an album and lol if David Harbour had listened to it just once he'd have stood correct.

Where am I mentally?

Watching a 2 hour Nuremberg documentary.

I hear the YP conference convener just called out someone using 'transphobic' and said they want to keep things respectful

There it is, lads.

There's your party.

Turns out it actually did hurt my feelings.

I PAUSED CANADA'S DRAG RACE TO SUCK YOUR DICK AND YOU DISRESPECT ME!?

I may not be an Adonis but I am a fucking God when it comes to handling dicks.

That kind of rejection from someone definitely regarded as less physically attractive than me is not the one.

But, at the end of the day, it's midnight and it's his loss.

Arranged an edging meet. No face pics were swapped.

He turned up and went "Nah, not for me" and walked away and the man looked like he'd fit in at an asylum hotel riot and hadn't eaten anything green since Gordon Brown was prime minister.

What tf do you think you look like?

If anyone is curious what triggered it...

I'm losing my eyesight and the *only* final solution the NHS are offering isn't going to work and I can't magic up £7k to go to a private hospital so I can actually see properly after 3pm every. single. day.

Might be fully done.

Think I'm ready to shut down til Spring.

The black dog found me waaaay quicker than it normally tries to and it's mauling my face.

Presiding over =/= the decision of guilt.

Also, those countries do have jury trials, they're just held in a different constitutional framework than English law.

I don't know why I'm surprised that a Hun would be happy to get shagged by the state... it's totally your thing.