ShortEye

My cricketing idol, Portsmouth net buddy, Bournemouth relationship advisor, and Cowherds ‘swift half’ companion.
Sleep well Judgey, RIP. 😢

Poor little Pick-itouthenet-ford! 🦖

David Geddis put in a decent cross for Roger Osborne in the ‘78 cup final.!!!
Never had him down for a player on the North East’s political scene! 🤣

Exactly! In Livvy St, that half’s probably worth a fiver!

There’s nothing that says you’re getting old as when you spend more in a week on ibuprofen as you do on alcohol.!

I’d be inclined to accept £45, a large tub of flexible tile adhesive and a footlong from Subway! Meatball Marinara of course, I’m not THAT easy!

You misspelled Cults!!!!

I have it on good authority that EH told him he needed to improve or face the 🪓.
Ramsdale does strike me as being a strong 5th defender. He plays high and seems to like to be involved, but Pope’s goal line reactions are phenomenal.
Who’d be a manager?!

Sad fact of life as a keeper is if you make a mistake, it usually ends up as a goal.
He made his mind up and didn’t change it, which I’d always prefer to hesitation, albeit it was the wrong choice!
I’d rather pile on Gordon for that chance before half time..! Missed the cross completely!!

a man and a woman are standing next to each other and the woman is asking the man if he ever had deja vu ALT: a man and a woman are standing next to each other and the woman is asking the man if he ever had deja vu

Or as the French say, ‘Newcastle away’!

Doesn’t matter how fit or good you are, chasing possession for such a sustained period of time kills your legs.

Save that and paste it again on Saturday!

I’ve got half a dozen idiots in my Y9 class who have a better grasp of experiential learning than some of our lot..! #nufc

To say nothing of an invisible scouser?! Outpaced and outran and out-barneted by a 36 year-old sporting a Michael Jackson Bad-era haircut!!

The Metro doesn’t usually sound like this! #nufc

Nope!!!
That’s when having OCD actually comes into its own!

I remember playing French Cricket at school.
Top order last night very reminiscent of my idiot classmates trying to spank a baldy tennis ball over Blaydon Bank using a tennis racket with about 9 strings in it!

I’ve emailed the ECB for a sleep refund!

I’ll see your 3 and raise you a day!
Pope driving at The Barrel did it for me. Awful, awful shot!
I’m sorry, but why, with 4 full days of play remaining, (and 🇦🇺 hobbled with 2 front line bowlers missing and the spinner’s hip hurting) do we dispense with solid defensive techniques and leaves! 🤬🤯

I’m wondering if he’s currently on the phone to the airline begging for his money back?!
I’ve already called the ECB asking for a sleep refund….. Turns out they’re shut on a Saturday!

Some bloke was on the BBC cricket live updates saying he was flying 4000 miles with a ticket for day 3, and he’s shitting the bed that he won’t even get a full session!! 🤣🤣

I had it down as a Go-Ape style Fred Dibnah Themed Adventure Park!

Whilst balanced on your knee in the vehicle driver’s seat…! What could possibly go wrong?! 🙈

You’ll be the only person in town serving cocktails in pint pots! 🙈🤣

‘We’re gonna need a bigger glass!!!’

#nufc worth pointing out that Attwell got 2 penalties wrong, and VAR failed to put those wrongs right! 🤔

#nufc this is on Howe. Hall should have been on 20 minutes ago!
I love BDB, but he was screaming sub me from the end of the 1st half. Fuck me I’m fuming!!!!!

That Lewis Hall cameo was a game changer as well.

Hats Off, she’s spot on!
This is on repeat all day tomorrow!
Dan Burn, you Big, Beautiful Blyth Bastard!!

BIG DAN BURN’S BENDY HEADER.!! 👊 #nufc