Recovering People Pleaser

Consoling a friend who lives on the other side of the country and will be spending the upcoming holidays alone as she lost her dad as a child and her mom last year.She is an only child of 2 only children and unmarried with no kids. Please be kind to those for whom the holidays are tough

Imagine warning people from a city with paved roads and funded schools and sidewalks and hospitals and corner delis to not come to Missouri 😂

Is perpetual sadness a thing? I think I have it.

Anxiety sucks. It sucks even worse when you have it on behalf of someone else. If you are the praying sort, if you could offer one for my kid. If you’re not…can you offer good vibes or positive thoughts or whatever good you got.

Our local community lost a pillar last evening. His fifteen year old son found him. My heart breaks for that boy.

I was born at the children’s hospital in Washington DC

You know, Muskrat has been mighty quiet lately…that makes me nervous…

Also, I fucking hate Signal. I’m only on there so a government official can leak me top secret security info but still…

Trying to be more positive. I only screwed things up four times today.

Getting ready to quit. I cannot handle how hostile the environment was today.

Well, I needed something to go right today, and it turned out to be getting Connections in four

People to my face: You’re so positive even when bad stuff happens.
Me (in my brain): Actually I’m not, I internalize everything and then vomit it anonymously on socials.
Me (in person): Well, it makes it easier to get through the day…

So fucking annoyed. 😒 Siri: play I hate it here by Taylor Swift.

So fucking done. Looking into new jobs asap

Just got in trouble for doing something I had no idea was wrong in the situation

It’s my birthday. Just got yelled at by a family member. Because of course I did. This is my annual reminder of what a fuck-up I have been from the beginning.

Sometimes I’m jealous of Lucy in 50 First Dates.
Someone loves her enough to daily try to repeat the last day she remembers

What the actual fuck is happening? This timeline is the darkest.

Birthday-Eve. No one is going to celebrate me tomorrow.
I’m resigned to that. I get it. At least if I were at work, a few co-workers would say the words and it would be small but enough.

When you hide in the break room because another employee says you aren’t worth a fucking shit after an initiative you tried failed due to lack of support and supplies…

Also got the sad news of a friend’s spouse passing. This friend waited a long time to meet their person and losing them is just so gut wrenching.

My entire life has been one huge disappointment after another. Everyone I try to help, I fail. Always. And because I am nice and try to help, I get 100% of the blame. Maybe one day I will stop offering or stop agreeing when asked. It is more than hurtful to try so hard only to be treated so poorly.

Worth reposting

Trump's America

Got forgotten today for lunch orders. Again. Feeling awful, but realize this is the norm and I probably should get used to it and to ignoring it and just try to look out for myself a bit more and stop assuming anyone cares about me or my feelings or needs. Because no one does.

And now another friend gone. I am glad she is no longer in pain but I do miss her so.

And in the meantime I will remember Shannon Hoon. Just wow.

I was told to shut the hell up. Guess that’s what I will do. It is really hard to be the person no one loves or values everywhere you go. The person never chosen and never wanted in every situation.

2. Therapy is a waste of tax payer dollars. Just say the quiet part out loud. You hate my kid for being different. You hate me for being her proud mother. You think autism makes me a bad person and shames our family. #thisiswhywecanthavenicethings

1. Also my bitch of a MAGA aunt is all over fucking Facebook defending that asshat in chief for not being able to pronounce acetaminophen saying people are making fun of him for having a speech impediment. Meanwhile my child cannot speak at all and she thinks funding for Medicaid covered speech