Needs2Hyperfixate 🇨🇦

Desperately need both Monica Lewinsky and Misha Collins to comment on this. 😂

millennials not only experiencing unprecedented events every damn year of our lives but somehow we get two Bill Clinton Blowjob Scandals almost thirty years apart. smh they just keep making terrible remakes of the classics. Except this one is infinitely funnier than the original.

Jayce Talis look what I found for you ❤️🔨

Me, to a cat, very seriously: Bro you almost gave me a heart attack.

Cat: mreow.

Turned out the noise was one of said cats, being mischievous in the closet just around the corner from the garbage can, and I just have very bad directional hearing.

Was in the kitchen makin' soup when suddenly the rustling sounds of Something Very Alive started coming from the garbage can. I was about ready to start throwing cats in there in the hope they would eat Whatever It Was.

Nothing gets done in the lab again #jaycetalis #viktorarcane #jayvik

At 34, some people become mayor of New York City, and others are too busy physically fighting a poodle for their mother's affection.

In defense of the typo in the third post, I was with her when I wrote this. Made stupid by love smh 😩

"Oooh edgy billionaires and assassins" booktok get on my level I'm trying to fuck the ocean.

If I had my way even my death would be hers. Not as ashes but whole, wrapped in sailcloth and stitched through the nose, fed to the things thronging and feasting inside her. Hers forever and ever.

I taste her in the storms coming off the water miles away. Taste her more when I climb her stone walls at high tide and let her fury and her desire spray across me. There is nothing quite so giddy as licking her from my lips.

I will always be hers. She will never be mine. She will love me 'til the day I day, but she has loved so many before. Will love so many alongside me. Will love so many after me. I am a blip, a brief flicker against the immensity of her.

She's dark and broody, powerful and violent, full of ghosts and secrets. But sometimes she smiles so sweetly and tucks pretty little rocks into my hands.

The real problematic age gap, problematic power gap, "immortal/now grown-up kid they used to babysit" ship is the Atlantic Ocean/me.

6 months later I shall now rescind my finger, thank you Mr d’Entremont 😂

I have been singing 🎵the name is Mamdani, M-A-M-D-A-N-I🎶 all night. I am Canadian 😂

Mamdani and all those other democrat wins in the States and here at home a conservative MP crossing the floor, so now as I understand it we're only two old-timers getting sick of PP's Trump Lite shit and realizing 20 yrs ago Carney would have been their guy anyway away from a lib majority 🥳

I know it doesn't magically fix shit but it's such a good news kinda night and for now I am simply basking

genuinely beautiful that new york elected a muslim lefty mayor the same day that dick cheney died

understandable

But given that foundation at the start of my life, it is A: no wonder I have an anxiety disorder, B: no wonder I turned leftist in spite of every attempt to make me otherwise and C: INCREDIBLY FRUSTRATING HOW RIGHT THAT PARENT HAS STAYED.

Now mind you this was pre-911 and my parent is a white English-speaking immigrant from the US to Canada anyway, meaning frankly those fears were probably unfounded and everything would have been fine, because privilege. And they did get everything sorted legally eventually.

For the first few years of my life I was the child of an illegal immigrant who was TERRIFIED of being discovered and taken away from their children. I was four years old taking the rent cheques to the landlord (just next door, granted) alone because my parent was too scared to leave the house.

There may come a day in a woman's life when she spends a solid three minutes trying to plug an aux cable into a magic wand. And that's okay. 😌

You’ll never convince me that human beings are supposed to be working THIS hard, at this frequency, and for as long as we’ve become accustomed to. We are all so exhausted with no time to actually take care of ourselves or for each other. This shit hasn’t been normal for a while!

Why do I treat basic medication like it's a treasured scarcity? Is this generational trauma I got from my American parent? Why am I side-eying my inhaler while wheezing going "well I GUESS I can have a LITTLE ability to breathe. As a treat."

Pretty much every single one of these new government accounts is posting rage bait. It's possible (like 100% guaranteed) they are trying to provoke people here on purpose, so don't fall for it. Blockity block block block.