Rob Weldon

Pho cafe, I love you, but even after all these years, I feel you don’t really know me.

#pho #fortune #fortunecookie

The universe dressed me.
I expect a lot of music posts today.

#thecure #music #spotify #80s #90s

New favorite joke:

Customer walks into a bar, and the bartender says, “Why the long face?”
Oh, and also the customer is a horse.

*Elliott Kalan.

It’s an example of setup for an unfunny joke, but it’s hysterical to me because it subverts expectation that a worn out joke be told correctly.

#humor

Indie books for indie thinkers.
Support indie authors!
Holidays.
Planes, trains, and automobiles.
The introvert’s secret weapon.

#shopping #reading #writing

Think I could write CrossFit smut?

“She wanted to do lip pushups off his face and air squats on his hips.”

I suspect the answer is “No.”

😉😛

#romance #spicy

A procrastinator nickel and dimes time until they’re broke.

*posted, poor, after 2 pm

#writing #broke #procrastination

If I rerecorded my voicemail greeting to just say, “Stop,” would that reduce robocalls?

#spam

I’m guesting on the reviewx2podcast (The Review Review) next month to talk about the movie Being John Malkovich.

I’m curious if there are other podcasts that would like to have me and my six-book series as guests.

Tips!? Recs?

#podcast #interview

The Soul Phone Collector: Book Six of the Omnist Series Amazon.com: The Soul Phone Collector: Book Six of the Omnist Series: 9798989408108: Weldon, Rob: Books

www.amazon.com/Soul-Phone-C...

I love this time of year: dried leaves, spices, hot cider, baseball playoffs…and Halloween.

I wrote this over a year ago, but it fits the season.

I just canyon’t…

#piercing #clickbait #tldr

www.theomnist.com/contact

So few people see these posts. If you’d like to be on my email list for future books and events (literally only a couple a year), please DM me your email address.

Love you!

us12.admin.mailchimp.com/audience/for...

Horror Con LA 2025
Part I

#horror #halloween

A sign. A man. A town.

#california

Mostly Human, Mostly Cat: Book Two of the Omnist Series Mostly Human, Mostly Cat: Book Two of the Omnist Series [Weldon, Rob] on Amazon.com. *FREE* shipping on qualifying offers. Mostly Human, Mostly Cat: Book Two of the Omnist Series

I love when the ‘Zon puts one of my books on a sale price. Maybe it’s due to increased traffic from Horror Con?

#books

www.amazon.com/Mostly-Human...

Curious if any of you will be attending Horror Con LA this weekend?

#horror #horrorcon

Vocabulary of The Omnist series, part VII:

Who are Executive Saints?

Regular attendees of Consumia’s Spiritual Emporium—Consumerians—who “level up” their status by paying monthly subscriptions.

#bookseries #spirituality

Show a pic from the 90s:

Too-skinny, baby Rob, early 90s, and 50 lbs lighter.

Also, I forgot that shirt existed.

#90s

“I’m whore.”

Is that about me or the barista?

It actually stands for Irishman Mocha w whole milk. But that’s not fun.

#coffee #writing

So cool! I received an awesome crystal-inlaid coffin gift from a friend who is reading The Omnist series.

She’s now on book five, Wide-Eyed Wyatt’s Liquid Nap. Saw this, thought of Coffin Club. Sent.

Thank you!

#bookseries #coffinclub #theombist

Social media crap I disregard completely or block:

"Let that sink in"

My comprehension is top level.

"Wait for it"

I watch 100% but that one triggers a block.

"I don't know who needs to hear this, but"

Get the f off your soapbox. Let people figure things out. Blocked, too.

If writing makes me happy (it does!), then I shouldn’t be disappointed that I haven’t achieved a million sales and reads yet.

Stress is the enemy of my happiness.

#writing #motivation

Vocabulary and characters of The Omnist universe, part VI:

Who is Yksian? A scientific/spiritual theorist and philosopher Omniscian at CSE.

Is he a vampire?

Nearly seven feet tall (including boots and hat) with the slowest and deepest voice.

#books #philosophy #fiction

Revising my 7th novel. Not much about balancing vibes, exposition, and action gets easier.

Despite thickened skin for editor’s notes over time, the problems she highlights still reach my core.

#writing

My book series has influenced the names of my music playlists.

#inspiration

When I hear a song where the vocals are loud, too upfront, I just picture the singer’s fat head, all face, right in front of me, obstructing tiny images of the rest of the band.

Safe to say I’m not a fan.

#music #newmusic #popsongs

The Coffin Club logo, an outline of a coffin with a skull in it.

Vocabulary of the Omnist universe, part V:
What is Coffin Club?
An event where Consumerians (often terminally ill) build their own bespoke coffins and caskets.

Paint birds on it. Airplane cockpit. Dodger blue with LA logos. A lifesize skeleton.