The worst person you know

Every one of these, especially Stanley Tucci, but I would also like to add Patrick Stewart and Ralph Fiennes as people who would absolutely understand the assignment. It's a shame we'll never get Catherine O'Hara, whose magnetism would have been perfect.

Surely the meta humor is because they're performing for an adult audience, right? I can't believe they would ever do anything to spoil the magic if they were performing for kids.

My high school self would like to remind folks that if you absolutely must watch the terrible slop content, there are a million ways to do it without giving assholes money.

Ted Cruz couldn't win a presidential primary if the electorate was made up solely of his immediate family.

Fucking hell.

I suspect relatively few people understand that there are basically no uncontacted people left. There are plenty of people who like traditions and whatever, but the jungle/savannah shaman you're likely to meet wears Nikes and drinks Coke when he's not on the clock.

For whatever reason, you hear it much more clearly on the Canadian and British broadcasts than you do on the US one. Funny how that happened....

He knew he signed up to eat shit all day every day and I hope he lives a long, consistent life of getting exactly what he asked for.

Because I don't know anything. We have enough proven complaints without having to add extras.

For my American friends who have seen the BBC broadcast, "mixed reaction" is British for "the crowd is one step away from pitchforks and torches".

Incredibly funny how this dude's job is to just eat shit all day every day and pretend he likes it. Couldn't happen to a better person.

I'm not going to accuse NBC of pumping artificial cheering into the broadcast, but doing some very strategic microphone placement would be par for the course.

A comprehensive list of people who became RW shitheads after failing in the arts would break this website. The list of begats would be biblical.

I am gutted to learn that Ketanji Brown Jackson was at the Grammys because she was nominated for narrating her audiobook and not because she pseudonymously leads a liberationist spacesynth collective.

He also shot three consecutive perfect games of golf, invented the automobile, and doesn't poop. Not even in his pants.

Here is a thing:

There were several years when I was one of VERY few journalists seriously covering harassment and abuse issues in comics (and by extension sometimes video games). During that time, I became the Person People Told Things To.

(cont'd)

I'm going to cross my fingers and think a lot about how underrated that movie is and how good the BG3 writing is.

I support paying teachers the full value of their labor because no one wants a broke Condon.

YouTube video by The Puddleducks - Topic Milf Song

I'm not weekending yet, but I am carrying weekend vibes.

youtu.be/hu-ipeeB0x4

And a $5 bottle of it will last years because almost nothing requires more than like a teaspoon of it at a time.

I'm certain they will do at least a good job of bringing the populaces of Atlanta, Milwaukee, and Dallas to heel as they did of cowing Minneapolis, DC, and LA.

If you can only think of one dish to put fish sauce into, that's a skill issue. It's one of the world's great umami bombs, that goes in all kinds of stuff.

A lot. People in gerrymandered districts frequently vote in the R the primary as a way to mitigate harm by voting for the less crazy/fascist Republican.

The American tailor misunderstood when Graham said he was "really into front bottom".

A photograph of the posterior of a freshly-cleaned milk cow in a pristine pasture, a photo not especially representative of how dairy cows are commercially held. As a helpful device, I have added an arrow to the anus of the cow with a label reading, "poop comes from here", and another to the udders labeled "milk comes from here". A sharp-eyed viewer will note that the udders are located with almost strategic precision directly underneath the creature's butthole. For the less quick among us, I have appended an additional bulled point, "gravity exists". I hope this clears everything up.

A friend asked me what the problem is with raw milk, so I created this helpful infographic that I hope clears up the issue with the presentation of three simple facts.

Jacob Astor paid for the New York Public Library. Andrew Carnegie built the scientific foundation that bears his name. Who is going to remember Bezos's cock rockets as anything but a joke?

It was nice of him to show respect for the institution of Congress by digging out his prep school tie.

Graham Linehan prepared for this hearing by spending 57 years marinating in East Anglia's finest schlub.

Our saving grace has always been that these people are very very tremendously exceptionally unspeakably extraordinarily stupid.