Blake Nelson

MINNEAPOLIS, MN (2025) “Culture Crashout” "The Walker" felt dead. ZERO energy. Who was running this place?

MINNEAPOLIS, MN (2025) “Culture Crashout”
open.substack.com/pub/blakenel...

MINNEAPOLIS, MN (2025) “Culture Crashout” "The Walker" felt dead. ZERO energy. Who was running this place?

MINNEAPOLIS, MN (2025) “Culture Crashout”
open.substack.com/pub/blakenel...

HEALTHY AS A HORSE: My Journey into the Ivermectin Underground Don’t forget to hit the LIKE button if you enjoy the article.

blakenelson.substack.com/p/healthy-as...

Your room is ready, sir

PORTLAND, OR (1977) "The Loneliness of the Punk Rock Revolutionary" Where were you in '77?

PORTLAND, OR (1977) "The Loneliness of the Punk Rock Revolutionary"
open.substack.com/pub/blakenel...

NYC (1987) "The Night Andy Warhol Died" Of course, artists were sometimes terrible people. So what? I expected New York to be full of terrible people.

NYC (1987) "The Night Andy Warhol Died"
open.substack.com/pub/blakenel...

that was me.

NYC (1987) "The Night Andy Warhol Died" Of course, artists were sometimes terrible people. So what? I expected New York to be full of terrible people.

NYC (1987) "The Night Andy Warhol Died"
open.substack.com/pub/blakenel...

(guy who has only read two books) this orwellian shit is starting to seem pretty dickensian to me

This may seem cute but if you do this too much the cyclists may become reliant on cars feeding them, disrupting the delicate roadway ecosystem

BROOKLYN, NY (1988) "The Iowa Writers Workshop" The Iowa Workshop was like Julliard or Harvard Law. You were in rarefied air. You were within reach of the “big leagues.”

BROOKLYN, NY (1988) "The Iowa Writers Workshop"
open.substack.com/pub/blakenel...

BROOKLYN, NY (1988) "The Iowa Writers Workshop" The Iowa Workshop was like Julliard or Harvard Law. You were in rarefied air. You were within reach of the “big leagues.”

BROOKLYN, NY (1988) "The Iowa Writers Workshop"
open.substack.com/pub/blakenel...

What was Jerusalem like in 1984? It was PARADISE. Sort of . . . .

blakenelson.substack.com/p/jerusalem-...

How is "crashing out" different from having a meltdown?

Austin TX (1988) "I Want to Write You Long Letters" The electric typewriter hummed and vibrated. When you typed, it sounded like a machine gun.

blakenelson.substack.com/p/austin-tx-...

A shitpost so bad your mom shares it on Facebook

I am woman, hear me “whatever.”

don’t touch that, it’s my emotional support short story I started writing instead of working on my novel

if you ever get more followers on social media than your mayor you automatically become the mayor

Going back to dial-up so I get my bad news slower

*retrieving the charging cord from the floor next to my bed* i am an athlete

Advice on Marriage. TO YOUNG LADIES. 1. Do not marry at all. 2. But if you must, avoid the Beauty Men, Flirts, and the Bounders, Tailor's Dummies, and the Football Enthusiasts. 3. Look for a Strong, Tame Man, a Fire-lighter, Coal-getter, Window Cleaner, and Yard Swiller. 4. Don't except too much, most men are lazy, selfish, thoughtless, lying, drunken, clumsy, heavy-footed, rough, unmanly brutes, and need taming. 5. All Bachelors are, and many are worse still. 6. If you want him to be happy, Feed the Brute. 7. The same remark applies to Dogs. 8. You will be wiser not to chance it isn't worth the risk

Ladies… this advice, written on marriage in a pamphlet by a suffragette in
1918 is still relevant today 🤣
It is currently on display at the Pontypridd Museum in Wales.

i need a 52 year old man with $800 billion to impregnate my wife . i am worried our offspring wont be sufficiently feeble and/or annoying

NYC (1998) "Man vs. Ocean" To surf in the winter was a kind of a test . . . .

NYC (1998) "Man vs. Ocean"
open.substack.com/pub/blakenel...

sir, we are barreling towards planet Discover Feed. please advise

Remember: it's always darkest right before it goes pitch black.

i’m like if accidentally clipping your toenail too short were a person