lancer charmancer

no, it is not le emergent sandbox stealth game. shut up. tank controls with mouse aiming is hilarious. shut up. you are going to FAIL until you have every single schedule and interaction MEMORIZED. this is not a playground this is a TEST. PAY ATTENTION. do it clean, in one swift motion.

Hitman: Codename 47… wow…

for the record, RGG3 is fantastic

about 11 hours into RGG4. Kiryu has been not-so-quietly undergoing transformation into A Massive Square across the series, but the way he is characterized in his introduction feels like. a point of no return? gotta be all downhill from here.

Mario Kart World’s maximalist faux-jazz fusion too-punched-up soundtrack is offensively bad. sort of a visceral lack of understanding of the original compositions and video games in general

i did indeed light it up… i didn’t not like it! had a good time! just stiff competition in context of the list

good year so far 😀

ok i guess it was actually just one post 2 weeks ago 😵‍💫

realize an embarrassing percentage of recent posts have been about Zelda — a series i don't even care about! — HOWEVER. Zelda II: The Adventure of Link is VERY obviously VERY good and it is upsetting that this opinion is even slightly controversial. The '10's Nintendo YouTuber Opinion That Could

i know immediately which games Splat’s Adventure (not the title) will be compared to, and they’re all wrong. it’s Sticker Star. Splat’s Adventure is a Sticker Star-like. show some respect

obviously we like Sticker Star around these parts though my goal was not to recreate Things from first principles lmao

trying to think of Adventure titles where all (or most) of the typical Adventure interactions are the natural result of systems… and that’s just Paper Mario: Sticker Star, yeah?

Meet MAKE YOUR OWN FUN man!
"Just ignore 80% of your options"
"You control the buttons you press"
"You get what you put into it"
"Using any optimal strategy is your own fault"
"Can be" and "if you set your own goals" but never "is"
"Give me liberty! Give me fire! Give me twitter clips or I retire!"

Fusion is good because it hates Super Metroid

shoot. i still think Metroid is much more hostile to those going in map-less than Zelda. even with a map i got pretty turned around going into one of the many repeats like “ok wait is this a NEW infinite-respawn-bugs-that-kill-you-in-the-doorway room or…?”

also the fake Kraid is freaking hilarious

the old cave peoples' hints are mostly straightforward "go here and do this" save for a few cheeky lines. the potion gives two completely free full heals with one items slot. the late-game warp system is extremely considerate. fairy fountains are free and infinite-use

also the narrative around it being this cryptic hateful work for true note-taking perverts is overblown. the game honestly just goes down real smooth! i sat down recently and played the whole thing for the first time w/ pen and paper and found that… i didn’t really need it. sorta disappointing

love love love the dungeons and how un-designed they are. like there’s still a lot of thought put into them, especially the encounter design, but Zelda dungeons start feeling like Duplo Blocks to me around… lttp? i dunno i miss when dungeons were just kinda allowed to be rooms with a buncha guys

in my social sim dungeon crawler RPG, buying items at the store is a great challenge (really annoying) as to encourage the player to plan far ahead the items that they will need

started and played about an hour of Touch Detective and: good lord the Nintendo DSiXL

not subtweeting anyone in particular but i've noticed a specific kind of insecurity in a specific kind of online vgm-stylized composer that manifests as... fear of rinky-dinky-ness? over accentuated "coolness?" like man have you played video games

i really love the fact that the levels (mostly) aren't specific to Plague Knight. gives the campaign a square peg-ish-ness that i think works thematically

鈴木爆発 (enix/sol, ps1, 2000)

you can hear it too?

YouTube video by Neko Cassowary Final Fantasy Adventure - Chocobo (Extended)

the comedically dense chords in the intro and cluster stabs throughout are so lancercore. they already made my arrangement of the Chocobo Theme for me

i won’t even lie i see Link to the Past as an S-tier fraudster pick at this point. i have more respect for the person who says Ocarina of Time is their favorite Zelda. and i at least *almost* like Link to the Past, which cannot be said for Ocarina of Time!

the idea of locking you in a dungeon but giving you full access to a shop at any time is a cool idea i wish they designed it at all. these days i’m pretty allergic to the Good Game Design Playskool Puzzle Cubes ala The Legend of Zelda… though having said that you can design them a LITTLE BIT

i think the Game Boy has some kind of spell over me. even as i can acknowledge Seiken Densetsu is — not trying to condescend here — a pretty perfunctory action adventure title with some neat quirks to it… top of the list. top of the freaking list.

this is about RGG4, by the way. i literally actually completely involuntarily SCREAMED when i got character control and pressed the L1 button. they freaking knew