Pants Macabre

Not my bedroom btw don’t come for me about the mess

The outfit / the fragrance

This feels like a good time to say that there has NEVER been a good Moira Rose impression, and anyone thinking about bringing theirs back today, NOT THE TIME.

Bathtime for Frankie ft. bombastic side eye, Fiddler on the Roof and Claudia Winkleman

These are people who are ‘proudly woke’, pronouns in bio etc, mind you.

A m/m couple I know really well (and who know me!) decided to make a whole carousel on Insta the other day about their ‘magical, bucket list visit’ to the HP studios the other day, with photos of them in full robes, talking about how they were proud Gryffindors etc. I didn’t even know how to react.

The tubes would rise and I would just be a mass of mangled flesh on the platform with no explanation. Just ripped apart by pure apathy.

I do not care about the problems of rich people. I just don’t.

Them: who’s up for afters?
Me:

Can everyone keep it down please, my son is sleeping.

Proud to be an outlier 🥲

I would have voted for a Stephen Sommers Odyssey. Colourful, quippy, etc. #makeactionfilmsfunagain

How have they made a story like The Odyssey look boring as fuck? Hate this trend of movies looking dull and washed out just so they can be called gritty.

oh wow ok 😅👍

You’re entitled to your very incorrect opinion ❤️🫣

Me meeting a gay couple:
‘so.. which is the frog and which is the pig?’

We should have a different royal family every year and have a big contest with talent shows and swimsuit rounds.

Ok he just asked me with absolute sincerity ‘Is it called Lapland because it’s where you sit on Santa’s lap?’.

WE’RE BACK ON PEOPLE 😍

cotymapper

Just 0.001% hold three times the wealth of poorest half of humanity, report finds.

This is obscene.

That others in politics can’t or won’t say that this is obscene hits at the heart of the problems we face.

We are the 99.999%.

Tax the super rich.

Join.greenparty.org.uk

My boyfriend has never seen Muppets Christmas Carol and he refuses to because ‘he hates The Muppets’. When I point out that he can’t possibly know that because he’s never seen anything with them in he just scoffs.

So I guess my question is can you divorce someone you’re not married to?

Or the south of England?

A hands free topless selfie of Andrew with extremely messy hair

The hair be bedding

A screenshot showing that my top song of the year was ‘Piano for Dogs’ by Dogify

🐶

A mirror selfie of Andrew topless in green chinos. There is a rather indiscreet bulge in them.

A mirror selfie of Andrew topless in green chinos. There is an indiscreet bulge in them.

Guess who forgot to pack underwear for this weekend.

In the richest city in the richest country on the planet, the thing we can’t afford is to forget those who are left hungry.

a man in a suit sits in front of a crowd of people ALT: a man in a suit sits in front of a crowd of people

Ant and Dec: *breathe*

The I’m a Celeb crew:

Why are all birthday cards either:

‘To my sweetest, most beautiful love – you are pure sunshine wrapped in stardust and gold and I worship you as the ocean worships the sand’

Or:

‘Fuck me you’re old and everyone thinks you smell like shit. Hurry up and die you disgusting alcoholic slag’

I made mini me visuals for our performance tonight at Pride, and I am actually obsessed.