Bob A

Gross

people will say life is a roller coaster, but i don't think that's true. it's more like one of those kids rides where they give you a steering wheel to turn, but no matter how you turn the wheel, you keep slowly going in circles until everything stops

Hell yeah baby

smugly posting to cow LinkedIn that I got accepted into one of the Temple Grandin slaughterhouses with the curved chute and high walls

(jeff bezos emerging from a cocoon of goo fully nude with rippling muscles bursting from every inch of his taut, smooth skin) i always looked like this by the way. you're fired.

a nation on edge holds its breath as the former host of celebrity apprentice huddles with his advisors, the wrestlemania ceo and the former co-host of fox & friends weekends

Sassy canister

I need to be more like the sassy canister

napoleon was the original Island Boy

This is the content I’m here for

The battlefield is a classic place to encounter and destroy one's foes

doctor: well mr. yoda, we fixed the language center of your brain. you should talk totally normal now

yoda: thanks dude

ok i understand vetoing Gross Greg or The Jakkster or any of the gross ones but you really don't want me to do ANY of my characters at our wedding??? your parents love my characters babe

it's very important to have a friend that reminds you you're not special

had a friend point out that my crush on Jenny Lewis during college was not in fact unique and borderline cliche.

it was a peg i needed to be knocked down

“Uptown Girl” goes pretty hard. You can just say stuff on here

ALWAYS ALLOW

Don’t make me say it

A SKALATON REEPIN SOME SEEDS OF WHAT THEY PLANTED , IF YOU WANT TO HARVEST AT THE END OF THE YEAR YOU MUST PLANT IN THE BEGINNING OFF IT, AND NO LASTING FULFILMENT EVER CAME FROM PURCHASING SHYT ON LINE, EXCEPT FOR COOL TSHRITS AND OTHER WORK'S OF ART, OR DRUG'S, DA FREINDS YOU MAKE ON YOUR PHONE ARE FREE, NO TIME SPENT ENJOYED IS WASTED, MONEY IS WASTED ON THE WEALTHEY, WE WILL WIN DA BATTLE AGAINST THE OLIGARCHY, JUST NOT AS SOON AS WE WANT AND NOT AS EASILY AS WE LIKE - AS DA LEGENDARY SUN TZU ONCE SAID "IF YOU WANT TO WIN A WAR TRY TO VANQUISH YOUR ENEMYS" ANY WAY DA TEXT SAYS "DONT BUY ANYTHING TOMORROW, DONT BUY ANYTHING NEXT WEEK, DONT BUY ANYTHING NEXT MONTH, DONT BUY ANYTHING NEXT YEAR, THE ONLY THINGS YOU NEED ARE ART & DRUGS, YOUR LOCAL ARTIST HAS BOTH " - DASHARE.ZONE ADMIN AND STAY AWAY FROM PILL'S, I AINT A COP BUT ALL DA GOOD SHIT GROWS OUT OF THE GROUND ANY WAY,,,- DASHARE.ZONE ADMIN

SUPPORT THE ART'S - dashare.zone ADMIN

Not since Prohibition have so many Americans wanted to commit the same crime at once

Time Magazine Horse of the Year

Bought the cheapest possible Mercedes today because I needed to use the bathroom at the dealership

to make peace with a world in eternal chaos requires you remove yourself from it as much as possible. no noise, no light, no smells, no taste, maybe 1 soft food item for when you get hungry. if you're hungry it's too distracting to find inner peace. and when pizza's on a bagel you can have pizza an

Gary on my Squidward son

Old doggs

[heart “barracuda” voice] smooth… Abe Vigoda

on my deathbed: a website you could go to that played a bad song. cute hamsters danced around.
KIDS: Alright you can disconnect him now