Normie Puppet

its how he would want to be remembered most, thats all

Redbull Butter

theres an old saying in texas... fool me once .... shame on you ....

I'm always 5 years ahead of the curve

whats crazy is I am the complete opposite. During and immediately after the shoot, "I am a genius", then after editing "I am trash"

usually you arent allowed this knowledge until you are on the verge of 40, but from now on you simply stay mid to late 20s forever. Dont tell anyone I told you this

Dont allow him to read any more. In fact I'd ban all further learning of everything in your house just to be safe

I love it when you can formulate my own thoughts better than I can

this is very good news! 💟

getting a vasectomy for mothers day

if it were my pawpaw I would tell him to use that stubbornness he is so strongly filled with on the PERSON CALLING HIM. Give them as much grief as you give the rest of us trying to get you to do something GRANDPA! :)

or if they are calling "from the bank" tell him to hang up and call his bank directly to ask if it's legit.

Do you think he would be receptive of the suggestion to just call the person they are claiming will take action before he sends money or does anything from now on? Like if someone calls and says he will be arrested, have him hang up and call the police to ask them

so relatable :(

Your efforts are noted and appreciated by me, even if the intended recipients arent as grateful. I hope the day is going by with as little suffering and frustration as possible.

looks innocent to me

As a 6'6" Puppet my job, as it seems, when I go grocery shopping, is to make sure that all the Tiny Princesses, Elves and Non-Vertical Queens have everything they need from the top 2-3 shelves in that isle. It is also more daunting than the dishes (hunched over killing my back) but it has to be done

Have a great birthday!! 🎂🎉🪥💊

amazon yelled at me for making entertaining reviews

like how desperate are they at Lens Crafters? PLEASE TELL US YOU ARE STILL COMING IN NEXT TUESDAY??? OKAY WE'LL CHECK AGAIN TOMORROW

Make an appointment and not get 50 calls and texts during the 2 weeks leading up to the day challenge (impossible)

Thank you for spreading the word about my small business!

I'm very delightful

the thing is, reality is completely made up and people just follow these unwritten rules that make no sense if you scrutinize them. So I've always let all of that slip through my fingers. It's fun! :)

i want to be them

wite about nowwww, da blopp dee boobie

youre going to be an amazing mom 🥰

Get back on twitter commie

The Ideas Curse