J¡m Vaughn

They are endangered and thankfully illegal to import or sell in the US. Though I found them for sale on MorphMarket in less than five minutes, so God bless America, I guess.

Rating: 8/10 for blue-ing himself

Some speculate it might be exposure to Elliot Smith songs.

These arboreal, diurnal lizards can grow to 1m or 3.5ft and are great climbers. They have prehensile tails that allow them to escape into trees to flee predators.

A long, skinny lizard with long claws clinging to the side of a tree with it's head tilted forward and a red eye trained on the camera. It's scales are black with a bright blue ringlet pattern "Blue Tree Monitor (Varanus macraei)" by guppiecat is licensed under CC BY-NC-ND 2.0. To view a copy of this license, visit https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/2.0/?ref=openverse.

jiminy's animal reviews: This clever girl is a blue tree monitor (𝘝𝘢𝘳𝘢𝘯𝘶𝘴 𝘮𝘢𝘤𝘳𝘢𝘦𝘪), endemic to the island of Batanta by the coast of Indonesia. Discovered in 2001, this reptile is not yet well understood. Biologists have not carried out any studies on its diet, nor do they know why they’re blue. 🧵

Gotta normalize saying that dude bros who illegally street race have the zoomies.

Sorry your boyfriend thinks cunnilingus is a type of cloud.

Gotta normalize saying that dude bros who illegally street race have the zoomies.

Goooood morning, Bluesky! Today's episode is brought to you by Planet Fitness, featuring our easiest cancelation process ever! Simply bring us the Horn of Buldok after navigating the labyrinth beneath our headquarters and defeating Gogmagog!

🫂🫂🫂

A large black manx cat with one eye laying on her side on a rug with a catnip stuffed cat toy next to her head.

It's #Caturday. Post void.

One of the side effects of the industry making trains longer and longer. 😮‍💨

Tangled titles complicate tornado recovery for North St. Louis | St. Louis Magazine The good news for North Siders whose houses lay in the path of the May 16 tornado: Recovery aid, both public and private, is there.

The St. Louis 🌪️ Tornado is a tragedy with domino affect sadness and legal messes.

Please. Put your wishes in writing, legal documents: a Beneficiary Deed for house recorded with your Recorder of Deeds and Power of Atty for Health Care & Health Care Directive missourilawyershelp.org/legal-topics...

Sure, I may not know how to finish a sentence, but

If enough of us chip in $10, we can buy a ghost town and rename it Skeet City.

Because it can't 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 any excitement for the product, it sounds like a robot describing food. It was rote, paint-by-numbers boilerplate that made me not care because they clearly don't care, either. At least enough to try actual creativity. With AI, there can't be creative evolution.

When Gladiator 2 came out, I kept hearing these bizarre, long form podcast commercials for it that had clearly been written by AI. The verbosity, the diction, the cadence... everything was "off." It read like the back cover of a book, but with zero passion or engaging wordplay.

Fuckin' bastards.

Just to be clear, I am going to turn invisible.

going back in time to tell john calvin predetermination is real but only french people go to hell just to see what happens

Saying "goodnight" and giving a little boop to every pop-up ad.

*wipes booger in replies*

If Bluesky is truly dead, at least I can pick my nose.

Waffle House. Doesn't matter which one.

They wouldn't let me in the medieval reenactment combat tournament because of my fighting style.

Turns out they don't allow freelancers.

A Google alert announces Chappell Roan concert tickets, but the image is of Weird Al

You sure about this, Google?

Highly recommend not looking that up on YouTube.

Rating: 10/10 for reppin' Pride

For the Brazilian rainbow boa, this occurs around four feet. I don’t wanna know what those age of consent laws look like. What is not typical for snakes, however, is that they are ovoviviparous. This means their young hatch before their eggs are laid, and are birthed live.

Native to Central and South America, they can reach lengths of 2m or 6ft. They are nocturnal hunters, ambushing anything a snake its size eats. They are also triathlon champs, being found on land, in trees, and in water.

As is typical for snakes, they reach sexual maturity with size, not age.

A long brown boa constrictor with an elongated face, covered in dark brown circles (some with yellow in the middle) laying on a log. It has an iridescent sheen covering its scaled. "File:Rainbow Boa (Epicrates cenchria) juvenile (14115578555).jpg" by Bernard DUPONT from FRANCE is licensed under CC BY-SA 2.0. To view a copy of this license, visit https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0/?ref=openverse.

jiminy's animal reviews: The Brazilian rainbow boa (𝘌𝘱𝘪𝘤𝘳𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘴 𝘤𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘩𝘳𝘪𝘢) is a popular snake in the pet trade, and that is largely due to their iridescent sheen. It is created by their scales acting as prisms by refracting light, which fools predators into thinking they are just a video game glitch. 🧵

A photo of a bearded dragon on the right, staring off with a Bowser Nintendo Amiibo.

Neither will budge.

I heard Sydney Sweeneys right boob is called ma and her left boob ga