Sophia Peach

A fake paperback book cover - " the room where Dracula sucks his own dick - he breaks into her house and sucks his own dick in the attic "

This is not the print I ordered but it is really, really funny so I'll take it

Newspaper photo of a group of cats huddled together on a satellite dish with the headline, "Outdoor cats are using $500 Starlink satellite dishes as self-heating beds."

Cats are and always have been cyberpunks

A poor little free library box knocked over in some bushes.

Apparently Big Library sent their goons to knock over our neighborhood’s little free library box. There is no end in sight to the Great Book War.

Brb, mainlining espresso because I’m clearly not sleeping for awhile

I'm old - how do I know? I just had to check how old I am.

So wtf am I wearing to the party at the Chinese Embassy ya'll

HLN is straight up the 24/7 forensic files channel... so when Lana Del Rey said in her masterpiece "Forensic Files wasn't on," she was straight up not looking in the right place

I just checked in at the Atlanta airport and the kiosk wanted me to show a "passport or permanent residence card."

The airline rep who was helping me said "I don't know why it's doing this it's been doing it all morning."

I got "inside friends" and "outside friends."

Inside friends = people I would invite solo into my home.

Outside friends = people who I make sure to meet on neutral ground.

Getting stuck walking behind someone slow on a narrow sidewalk sucksssss ass cause there is no way not to be creepy about it

We just wanted to take a moment to thank all our new supporters! Tomorrow, there will be more of us!

american society has been at “TV Interstitial from ROBOCOP” for a while but “president does a car commercial on the white house lawn” is really pushin it

YES. THAT DUMB CUNT HASN’T EVEN POSTED TO INSTAGRAM THIS MONTH.

Why does Kylie Jenner only date guys whose name starts with T?

Don't worry guys - millions of people live under fascist dictatorships just fine.

Ready Fire Aim is a lousy way to govern.

My friend just had her second baby in 3 minutes. She's speedrunning childbirth like a Minecraft YouTuber.

I keep waiting to wake up from this nightmare

Monday: Government Lawyers state the Elon Musk has no formal authority over federal employees

Saturday: After declaring ‘I have become meme’ Elon Musk declares that all federal employees have to respond to an email or be fired.

Ah - guess I just haven't been on during one of the previous episodes

Why is reddit down??

🗣️ @aoc.bsky.social out fighting for the people & federal workers: “Every day our job is to wake up and say ‘what can I do today?’ — There is no act too small. Every action matters.” 🇺🇸

STOP BEING SO DEFEATIST.

As a 28 year old I can confidently say that I do not have any teenagers in my peer group and, looking back, the 28 year olds in my peer group as a teenager were fucking weird.

With the White House blocking media that doesn’t comply with its narrative, we assume this is why these protests are being ignored.

The 50501 Movement has planned protests at all 50 state capitols and the U.S. Capitol on Presidents’ Day at noon. While mainstream media isn’t covering it, many YouTubers have stepped up to provide coverage.

man i am just straight up not interested in people who will be perfectly okay in the next couple years moaning in public over and over and over again that we’re all cooked and doing nothing else. fuck off man! some of us have things to live for

This morning Sean made me croissants for Valentines Day.

I proceeded to eat 4 of them.

This is why I can't have them any other day of the year.

Am I the only one who isn't using ChatGPT to write emails?