Matt Hiller

Ocr this it would be a lot of work to retype

From an October 2001 issue of The Onion and evergreen

I have busted
the ghost
that was in
your hood

and which
you were probably
scared of
and screaming

Forgive me
busting
makes me
feel good

YouTube video by Zohran Mamdani for NYC Until It's Done: Sylvia Rivera

Mamdani talking lucidly and passionately about trans rights and history in a video that should frankly shame every politician who has hemmed and hawed and triangulated and said, "Well, but sports..." It's not that hard to tell the truth and stand for what's right. www.youtube.com/watch?v=bEvV...

OH NO. HE. DIDN'T!!!

This whole thing gives me "A Streetcar Named Desire - the Musical!" Simpsons episode vibes

the new thing that girls are into is tesseracts. if you’re trying to impress women in 2025 you need to up your tesseract game, player

I clocked this behavior last time I flew -- on a completely full flight -- but didn't quite have the gumption to call the guy en-plane-ing in front of me out on it.

It can be excusable if one waits until after takeoff and then discovers that there's still bin space to allow it.

CHATGPT: I understand where you're coming from. You worked really hard to get here, and now it's time to enjoy the fruit of your labors.

ISILDUR: So I should keep it? Elrond says I shouldn't

CHATGPT: The ring is precious. Sometimes friends don't have your best interests at heart.

ISILDUR: true

'keeper mispositioned the wall here

A screenshot from the Lyft app showing that a 2.5 mile trip on an e bike in Portland, OR cost $3 even

Nice to spend a reasonable amount on an e-bikeshare rental instead of how exorbitant Citi e-bikes have become even for members.

And this includes a few minutes' of time where I just reserved the bike and hadn't walked up to it yet!

I would want to know if the teen cyclist had lights on his bike, 7:30pm is after dark lately

I've been retelling this joke as an old chestnut -- never claiming it as my own -- had no idea it was a Dangerfield line to begin with. TIL, thanks much!

Yeah man we should really fight back by staying on X

A free and democratic society cannot silence comedians because the President doesn’t like what they say.

This is an attack on free speech and cannot be allowed to stand.

All elected officials need to speak up and push back on this undemocratic act.

The free speech activist who built a list of professors he worked to get fired for their speech must be celebrated for his support of free speech, and anyone who quotes his speech accurately in context will be fired and/or face state punishment by the champions of free speech, do I have that right?

Even if the figure in rattling around in this numbskull's head was a worldwide figure, not US-specific, it's probably 600,000-700,000 deaths worldwide.

A mid-2024 UN report estimates ~292 million illicit drug *users* worldwide, with cannabis standing at ~228MM of that. news.un.org/en/story/202...

Got mine today and did the same both-in-the-left-arm strategy.

I should get that t-shirt too!

Charlie Kirk: Joe Biden should be "put in prison and/or given the death penalty for crimes against America"

I hadn’t seen this. Kirk, the moderate free speech guy who did politics the right way per some liberals (!), called for Biden to be executed.

Meanwhile Joe Biden put out a very strong statement condemning Kirk’s killing.

Both sides!

JUST IN: Brazil’s top court sentences former President Jair Bolsonaro to 27 years and 3 months in prison over his attempted coup

When I die, I want people to think back lovingly about me and say "oh, I thought she was already dead"

Just would take a constitutional amendment to allow it.

There was some loose talk of this in the early aughts when Schwarzenegger was a pretty effective Republican governor of CA but would not have been eligible for a POTUS run due to Austrian nativity.

JUST NOW: Donald Trump is booed by the crowd as he arrives at Arthur Ashe Stadium for the US Open men’s final

Shit, even the nosebleed tickets for this are like $657 list-price, absolute minimum. Can you even imagine if you'd shelled out for that and missed like 25-30% of the actual play time???

Whatever the reason was

Lol, kind of agree. Yeah, you can think to yourself "okay, I am gonna quit after parental leave", but that's a keep-cards-close-to-your-chest situation.