Every day I wake up and check the news to see if it's The Big Day. I can't wait for The Big Day!!

it's always sunny in philadelphia screenshot "You would have to be a real lowlife piece of shit to be proud to be an American."

dusting this one off

imagine having a friendly housecat that was your pal and walked around at your side and came up to your hips. only babies get to experience this

When it came out I watched it as a teen and I was like “meh, boring pirates of the Caribbean” and now I’m like “being on an early 19th century boat is viscerally terrifying”

I’ve never been to a 99 ranch but I’m excited to check the new one out once it opens!

I’m sure you know but Ota has bulk tofu blocks, though they’re pretty close-in. Bui is another option closer to you I think! But a hassle having to make an extra trip

This is going to be very bad and very stupid

Sometimes I get pretty sad at how sleepy this town gets at night. I know living in A City has associated amenities but after ten pm this place almost feels indistinguishable from the suburbs.

fucked up to think about but there was two grinches on noah's ark

god can you imagine if it was the troll face or some shit

feels like if the timeline was like 4 years ahead, instead of doge it'd be some kind of rage comic reference. still deeply embarrassing.

Centrist dipshits: all this horrible shit is smart politics, we know how to win

[They do not win]

Centrist dipshits: our foolproof politics can be thwarted by one viral tweet from an enby portland barista

The vibes there are so terrible lately. The blue light sentry tower in the parking lot so you don’t forget being constantly surveilled. Having to punch in your card number to return prices to merely high rather than exorbitant, reminding you they’re collecting your data to make a buck. Gross!

The Shortstack experience is a profound upgrade to the multiyear slog of homeowners watching their bank accounts dwindle while paying designers and engineers long before ground is even broken, all while wading through the vagaries of local building codes. Mere mortals abandon the process. “Infill development is notoriously high-touch and tricky,” says Shortstack cofounder Anna Mackay, who calls her line of work social impact development. “It felt really crucial to take the teeth out of that process as much as possible to foster more development.”

Mackay hopes that more normal people will become emerging developers, especially when they inherit homes. Instead of simply selling them, “Shortstack is hoping to be a tool for that entrepreneurial redistribution of wealth, and combating gentrification practices that have been really pervasive,” she says. “There are ways to keep that wealth in their family line and build wealth.” And just build. Literally.

The landlord article itself is just as disgusting as the headline. Meaningless capitalism as social justice pablum. fuck you yimbys

Pair of terrible headlines and sub heads: How to Turn That Property into an Income Stream, Portland Style A women-owned local company enables a new type of developer: you. Private Flights? A Whole New World for Travelers and Pets KinectAir, the Uber of airplanes, offers chartered, nonstop flights on the cheap across the Pacific Northwest.

Really gross pair of articles in the latest Portland Monthly mailing list email

Smaller bombs. Man I fucking hate this stupid country and our dogshit murderous leaders

Photo of the Pacific Ocean taken on the Oregon coast. Rocks, trees, surf

Hey who put that ocean there

If I can get one person to watch PHANTOM OF THE PARADISE, then my time on this awful website will have been worth it.

I gotta find a garnish like that! Seems like you could push it in a bunch of directions with whatever bitters selection you have on hand. But I’m looking forward to see what you come up with, even if it takes a few more tries

Looks great! I know you’re still working on it, but what’s in it?

Amaro (Lucano) and soda with orange peel in a rock glass

Lyre’s white cane spirit n/a rum, pineapple juice, lime juice, cinnamon simple, bittermen’s tiki bitters, soda, mint, highball glass

Posting drinks from the camera roll

Even the main Portland one has become super reactionary but there’s a second, even more unhinged sub that seems to have spun off because the mods were too woke (removing posts that threaten to run over cyclists or murder homeless people)

Last year I went to the local indie theater’s all night horror movie marathon and while it was definitely fun, four movies starting at like 9pm is such a slog. So I’m kinda glad they were sold out before I could snag a ticket this year.

Just realizing that I barely even check twitter anymore, and I used to read every tweet, every day for like ten years lol

Also I didn’t read the article. I’ve wasted enough of my life reading the nytimes lol

Screenshot of the r/portland subreddit post linking to NYtimes article with headline “In Rare Alliance, Democrats and Republicans Seek Legal Power to Clear Homeless Camps” Mod posts “Stop trying to dehumanize other human beings because you don't approve of their lifestyle. If all you want to do is hate on people for the crime of being homeless or poor, go somewhere else. Thread locked.”

Glad the mods locked it down but barffff. This sub isn’t even the most reactionary for their city, there’s another that’s even worse!

And the article tells you everything you need to know about libs

A Union Pacific Railroad Snow Wedge fitted to a heavy tank car, it consists of a very long wedge that pushes the snow aside and past with its shape and is painted with black and white stripes. It looks like a medieval weapon.

all street running light rail vehicles should be fitted with a terrifying wedge to emphasize that you will lose against this vehicle