“Elise”

My life partner just claimed he has never heard of Baby Shark. I never thought I would be a victim of gaslighting but here we are.

Weapons is like the best scary kids film you remember from your childhood. Except I will confirm that in no uncertain terms it is 100% an 18 rating. (Don’t read anything about it before you go).

Look at how clean they all are #totp

Completely separately three people have talked to me or texted me about plums.

Don’t understand why football/marvel films all have to be two hours long now

Go Get Arty - Drawalongs: 10. Harry Hill Harry Hill from Go Get Arty - supersized! In this extended Drawalong, the comedian hilariously draws himself being chased by a giant blue cat. Yes, really.

www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/epis... Somehow I was allowed to boss around some comedians and illustrators last year and now the video evidence of that is available to watch on iPlayer as its own mini series.

Oh fuck its extra time isn’t it? Why is that worse somehow? #euros

I spend 85 minutes praying it won’t go to penalties and then 12 minutes praying it will. Classic football #euros

I thought it was a lager advert until I looked again just now. Took the pic out the side of a cab while working so glad it came out tbh!

Accidental unicorn

What Moviedrome forgot to mention is that the short story Don’t Look Now ends on a really laugh out loud funny line.

Just popping down the South Bank to watch Stenders

I guess I assumed they just showed it on the Other Side as well, like Euro Cup Finals when England are still in.

Do you think one of our mutual older friends with a wiki account is trolling us? It just feels like something I would have torrented YEARS ago if I had known. And I assumed you would have written regular tweets about it.

I was allowed the kids TV I think and they did watch Morse. But I wasn’t supposed to watch Blind Date so whenever we had a babysitter that’s EXACTLY what we watched.

You think this is devastating, I just found out due to my parents’ (long ceased) snobbishness about ITV in the early 1990s I never even knew there was a TV gameshow version of Cluedo with David McCallum and John Bird until about 5 minutes ago.

I did think this was a muppets original #totp

Truck went over a full milk carton in the gutter so starting today covered in milk. It’s also the 11 year anniversary of me drinking a pint of milk live on stage (I grew up allergic to dairy). Happy Milk In The Wrong Places Day.

Couple having a right barney at Marylebone station but both so covered in post festival glitter it felt like public performance art.

My cousin’s wife is getting a CBE today. But they are also knighting that billionaire who locked his wife in a room while he went on a drugs bender while she died in there. So that devalues it all a bit.

The best wedding guest dresses and outfits: 30 favourites for every dress code and budget From silk to linen, midi-dresses to co-ords, these styles are made for wedding season and beyond

www.theguardian.com/thefilter/20... maybe if you put all these dresses on at the same time they assemble into the mighty morphin wedding guest dress that destroys all other dresses

Who’s gonna rebound first? Elon and Xi Jinping or Trump and Bezos? #breakup

Watching The Crown s2 tonight and it's jarring watching very restrained 1950s politicians saying things like 'it's a delicate matter, your majesty' and then checking the Internet in 2025 where elon musk is tweeting 'the president is a nonce, pass it on'

Thank you for this weird key that unlocks bluesky!

This is gonna be the same as when an unlikeable and incompatible aunt and uncle break up and you think thank god thats over and then the fall out is just an interminable and also impacts family weddings and international trade disputes for decades.

You keep promising this Doctor Who show is finished. I do not think you know what that word means #drwho

Just remembered he brought up Sophie Aldred at about 10.05am so I guess more fool me.

Made it until 10.05pm and then my partner mentioned Dr Who. Just one day. Just give me one day when it doesn’t come up.

This film is 2 hours 50 mins long. Putting a post credits sequence on it is presumably against the Geneva convention.

You know that thing where you put too much parmesan on your food?

I don’t.