“Elise”

Is this whole “the bad guys are getting away with shit because they are clever” vs the truth that the good guys are inept some weird scripted analogy for the state of the world? Or just a coincidence? #traitors

Anyone else terrified for Nick right now? #traitors

Just had the actual thought “I reckon it’s Stephen, Lucy and Nick.” AND I ACTUALLY KNOW WHO THE #TRAITORS ARE. That’s how bad the Faithful are at this.

Biggest shock moment of #traitors for me is the fact those cloaks are apparently green.

Was “chosen” a less sinister word in 1979? #totp

Fixed that for you.

Has there ever been an extra Traitor that the audience don’t know about (that the Traitors DO know about) that’s revealed later in a series? Can’t be arsed to watch the other series to find out.

Girl wearing band twirler outfit on totp

Me wearing a band twirler outfit

Me: Why didn’t I dress more like this when I had the chance?
Also me 14 years ago:
#totp

Which two other songs does Immortality sound like? I think it must be a song used on a gravy advert #totp

Is there any greater joy than forcing your best beloved to engage in your nichest pasttime and them not actively hating on it? (Tl;dr dragged Gid to watch close up magic).

Today I went and saw some sheep get moved around by some masons in the centre of a city and it should have felt like a metaphor for something but ultimately it was lowkey and cute.

Caveat - it has a lovely YA tone to it that’s not alienating as an adult but then quite a full on sex scene about half way through that I wouldn’t want to watch with my parents/teens. Also necessary spoiler- the dog is FINE.

If you like Severance, Feel Good and Weapons but wish someone would mix them together in a big bowl and add Toni Colette then that’s a weird thing to want. Luckily Mae Martin heard your weird brain and made Wayward.

I somehow only have £119 left of my student loan to pay off. Attempted to pay it over the phone but it was heavily implied that if the SLC then take more student loan repayment off my next pay cheque, I can’t get my voluntary payment back. So it’s better to let them take TOO MUCH and claim it back?

I mean IS there any greater joy than a dentist telling you she suspects you might need a root canal and then revealing you don’t need one at all?

The lesson is there is no lesson, life is a series of weird meaningless interactions and all you can do is type them into a void.

The only reason I’m not naming the venue is because one staff member there was SO wonderful and helpful I wouldn’t want to tarnish their reputation. Everyone else I have dealt with there has a very too cool for school attitude.

The box office person just stared at me and said “ok.” I felt vindicated by that.

Having just the worst experience with a venue this year but had a show booked there this afternoon. Took the ticket to box office and explained I wanted to give it back so someone else could have it for free as I was finding this venue too stressful to deal with.

Celeb fringe spot: Oobah Butler

Found some car keys in a park in London. Tried to find a police station to hand them into. All the ones I remembered are now shut. Ended up handing them in at a tube miles from where I found them and having to explain in an embarrassed manner why I had taken them so far away from where I found them.

BBC should do Heatwave Live and just have Anita Rani and weatherman Tomasz Schafernaker under a tree going live to other presenters in locations around the UK just saying “it’s really hot, isn’t it?” Because if I’m honest that’s about the highest level of TV I could make OR watch right now.

Dog tearing into toy as comedian performs on tv

The power of the internet. Finally allowing me to watch Josh Glanc while my dog tears a stuffed animal to ribbons. This truly is space year 2025.

My life partner just claimed he has never heard of Baby Shark. I never thought I would be a victim of gaslighting but here we are.

Weapons is like the best scary kids film you remember from your childhood. Except I will confirm that in no uncertain terms it is 100% an 18 rating. (Don’t read anything about it before you go).

Look at how clean they all are #totp

Completely separately three people have talked to me or texted me about plums.

Don’t understand why football/marvel films all have to be two hours long now

Go Get Arty - Drawalongs: 10. Harry Hill Harry Hill from Go Get Arty - supersized! In this extended Drawalong, the comedian hilariously draws himself being chased by a giant blue cat. Yes, really.

www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/epis... Somehow I was allowed to boss around some comedians and illustrators last year and now the video evidence of that is available to watch on iPlayer as its own mini series.

Oh fuck its extra time isn’t it? Why is that worse somehow? #euros