The_Crowbot

The Red Sox front office is going to go on Devers smear campaign the likes of which we’ve never seen before.

And now comes the part where the Red Sox organization starts putting out anonymous shit about Devers because they are shit and after all these years, still racist.

I kind of want to go

Much-needed good news for the Red Sox: Garrett Crochet has agreed to a six-year, $170 million extension. The deal runs from 2026-2031 with an opt out after 2030. Jeff Passan was on it.

History buffs will know that every authoritarian leader eventually converges on some version of: "I *am* the state. I can not break the law, I am the law, the law is instantiated in me."

Our march to authoritarianism so far has been excruciatingly by-the-book. Hitting every beat. No surprises.

One of our supporters shared this with us—people are getting creative tonight!

fixed it

The takeover of Twitter was a preview of what we're all living with now and a stark example of why you can't let any one person have too much money: they go insane and make themselves everybody's problem

2 insurrections, same President.

It’s all theatrics and performative.

Trump creates the problem or challenge.

Trump then offers a fake fix or solution to the fake problem or challenge.

Trump sycophants then cheer him as a genius and a political leader and problem-solver for the ages.

Rinse and repeat.

Theatrics. That’s it.

Worried about our nation’s descent into fascism? This one pot cacio e pepe will make you feel like you’re in 1920s Italy.

Total coincidence that the NYT, NPR, and NBC are all being forced out of the Pentagon and replaced with right-wing outlets. I’m sure those names were just picked out of a hat randomly!

I've assembled a team of the most horrible perverts and criminals you've ever seen and we're going to fix this country

Aaaand we have an alleged rapist alcoholic for Secretary of Defense.

We can assume Hegseth will say yes if Trump says he wants to employ the military to shoot protestors.

Man, I’ll tell you something. If Garland refuses to release the Jack Smith report based on that OLC memo about prosecuting sitting presidents, I’ll be on the fuck Garland train with all y’all. Promise.

The December 12, 2000 sports page headline from the Patriot Ledger that says "Welcome to Loserville" and contains cartoon parodies of the coaches of the Celtics, Patriots, Bruins, and Red Sox.

Since the Patriot Ledger dubbed Boston and its sports teams "Loserville" in 2000, the four franchises have combined for 13 championships.

Part of my collection too!

"Soto's agent, Scott Boras, also touched on how the Dominican star was irked by several players' political views, particularly their support for Donald Trump. Before Game 3 of the World Series, Aaron Judge and Anthony Volpe walked into the clubhouse donning Trump gear, finding it offensive to Latino-Americans. "[We] found several comments at his Madison Square Garden rally very offensive," agent Scott Boras said. "To see his teammates condone that behavior certainly affected him." When Soto met with Mets' superstar shortstop Francisco Lindor, he was much more comfortable with his views.

As a Red Sox fan, Judge being a Trump guy costing the Yankees Juan Soto is incredibly hilarious

The Onion Buys Alex Jones’s Infowars Out of Bankruptcy The satirical news site planned to turn Infowars into a parody of itself, mocking “weird internet personalities” who peddle conspiracy theories and health supplements.

Hi everyone.

The Onion, with the help of the Sandy Hook families, has purchased InfoWars.

We are planning on making it a very funny, very stupid website.

We have retained the services of some Onion and Clickhole Hall of Famers to pull this off.

I can't wait to show you what we have cooked up.

The Senate *hates* Matt Gaetz.

This is going to be an early check on whether or not they’ll be a realistic check on Trump’s power or if they’ll just roll over and do what he wants.

But the fact that a coked up pedo was even nominated for AG is insane.