Dan Grau

That reminds me, we gotta go hang out at the loyal legion and watch planes with the boys sometime.

If we're using the international date line as our divider between East/West:
North: Reykjavik, Iceland
East: Rotorua, NZ
South: Wellington, NZ
West, Honolulu, HI

You can't negotiate with terrorists.

Yeah, tomatoes in containers are really difficult in most regions, unless you're doing like hydroponics

He just pointed the hose at me and yelled, "Time for a dada wash! Run in it!"

Grocery store ad saying "stock up on the essentials" over hair trimmer, Reese's candy, and matchbox cars

The essentials

"There's so many blueberries in me!"

Today he said to nobody, "You can't go to the farmer's market. You're not a farmer!"

Sloppy Joe becomes the uberfood, being a stew sandwich

A moment with my 2-year-old:
"What's in my eye?... I've got eyeballs in my eyes!"
Proceeds to try to pry open my eyelid while repeating "Open your eyeball!"

After RFK posted this pic and declared the Caps "my new hometown team," Washington lost 3 straight and have now been eliminated from the NHL playoffs.

Despite being solidly part of the tech industry, I always read LLM as MLM before having to correct my brain. And honestly, the vibes aren't far off.

Andor pulling off a solid Prisencolinensinainciusol this arc

Interesting choice to do extended cut for a subset, and not all of nothing

Dude, how does this compare to the percentage of people who are polite to other humans? Because it feels like it's higher, which is depressing.

Frickin love Sparrow. Their ocean roll is a dream.

You know you're at the right concert when the band takes a break to read an excerpt from The Hobbit.

😢 Just re-watched Real Genius last week, actually. It and Top Secret will always be among my nostalgic faves.

Sir, there are surely people who's only exposure to ice cream is *Breyers*

Made passion fruit curd and Jesus fuck why am I not doing that more often?

i like the whole gondor/mordor thing. all cities should have an evil version right across the river, like DC and arlington

Practically pays for itself!

Well now it is, damnit.

I'd never buy anything from a door-to-door salesman regardless. My dream is to just wordlessly frown at anyone who tries while aggressively tapping the 'No Soliciting' sign. But I've yet to muster that courage.

we may not agree on much, but I agree with Trump here. make those planes with haste, boys. cut any corner necessary!

Found out that TWENTY emails is considered a lot to politicians on an issue.

TWENTY.

As in, they call that getting slammed.

So next time you see a request to email your rep, or call, keep that in mind.

TWENTY is a lot.

In fairness, “you can make millions of individual molecules but there are 13 that you need but can’t make so let’s outsource their production to plants. Also, it’s actually 12…you can make one of the vitamins…as long as the sun’s rays touch your skin like you yourself are a plant” does sound fake.

Yeah, I don't know what his problem is

just watched sesame street with my son. i don’t know. it’s not like i’m too good for it, it’s just that i know most of this stuff already. like, i work in journalism. i know 23 letters of the alphabet and i’m confident i’ll learn the rest over the course of my work. i don’t need a tv show for that

Yeah, holy shit