Ardinno

Don’t make me tap the sign…

Keir Starmer’s favourite Beatles album is “The Best of The Beatles”.

She’s only human - Becky is the GOAT. It’s not just me saying it either - Sports Illustrated is saying it too.

There’s still some sport(s entertainment) on tonight that might redeem the day for you!

Time to buy shares in misplaced apostrophes.

Ruin a book by adding "Tom Clancy's" to the title

Tom Clancy’s My Booky Wook

I hated his character in Game of Thrones. All he ever did was talk about himself.

That noise that Rolf used to make that sounded like an obscene phone call…we should’ve known right then that he was a wrong’un.

“Cinema’s”, “movies”, ”math”… This one is just bait for the miserable complainers, isn’t it?

Monzo too.

If you see this, quote this post with 10 games to get to know you by

Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
Assassins Creed - Odyssey
Mortal Kombat II
Goldeneye 007
Fallout New Vegas
Skyrim
Worms Armageddon
Vampire Survivors
Mass Effect Trilogy
Guitar Hero 3

Gig in release week maybe?

After 5 years - THE RETURN OF THE CRIBS.

TONIGHT. BBC 6 Music. Steve Lamacq.

Me too. I reckon it’s my favourite Crowded House b-side as it goes.

Every moment people are debating Kross’ contract status, they’re not talking about Brock Lesnar being in the Janel Grant lawsuit.

Alexa vs Roxanne next week will be a good one I think!

Now, go home and get your fucking shinebox!

‘On Friday, the force said detectives had sought advice from the Crown Prosecution Service and chosen not to take any further action on the grounds that there was "insufficient evidence to provide a realistic prospect of conviction for any offence".’

In other words, “they didn’t break any laws”.

Candymandaland

Don’t listen to it - give it 28 eggs.

Imagine you and another man just having to go 'the jelly was nice' or 'the asparagus needed two more minutes' and both of you fucking it up this hard

Glad to see you back!

A BBC news headline which says “Penguin says it did “all necessary due diligence” with The Salt Path

I’m no expert but I would’ve got a person to do it.

Excellent work. Next time, a name change to “Rothermere touches kids” might work? You could pair it with a picture of him hugging his kids in a wholesome way so that there’s no misunderstanding from the lawyers (some people will just jump to conclusions otherwise).

*receptacle only accepts extremely weak lemon drink

I honestly think that if Jason Donovan rereleased his 1989 song "too many broken hearts in the world" but the replaced the words 'broken hearts' with 'fucking cunts' he's got a worldwide hit on his hands.

The one silver lining in this scenario is that it forces me to stay away from social media until I’m caught up, which can’t be a bad thing.

This law should also apply to any episodic TV programme.

"You look like you would enjoy Dubai" is the most savage insult I've ever heard

Or at least one couple that aren’t both as thick as pigshit.