Jeremy A DIRE

Dwayne The Rock Johnson as a cigar-chomping deer pointing two pistols. From a parody Bambi movie trailer on Saturday Night Live.

91! But he recorded that heavy metal album a few years ago so he's probably blacklisted.

Pretty sure our D&D party once fought a bezoar.

Light isn't the problem for vampires on Jupiter. The difficulty is that to go there they have to be invited.

For as long as they can hold their breath.

Daaaaang, just skipping over Cincinnati.

Some day my next of kin will receive a file with that exact same title.

Two contestants place their bids on The Price Is Right. The person on the left has bid 1201 dollars. The person on the right has bid 2 dollars. The person on the left is wearing a red shirt. The person on the right is the "Where's my two dollars?" paperboy from Better Off Dead. He wins, by the way. Actual retail price was 1199 dollars.

Timeline cleanse.

Wings Greatest Hits.

We had this eight track in the car and the LP at home when I was a kid. I knew these songs by heart way before I heard about that McCartney dude's other band.

I inexplicably read that as B-29 and let me tell you I spent more time looking for that than I should have.

The thing that gets me about Denver is the giant, terrifying horse sculpture that killed the artist and is 100% possessed.

Ryan Gosling in an SNL alien abduction skit. He's wearing a baseball hat that's just amazing and fits his head perfectly.

"And just by using the power of their minds they told us about their star wars."

Let's see which NFL teams honor the antivaxx podcast troll that said MLK was a bad person and that the Civil Rights Act was a terrible mistake.

Nancy Mace tweet: Time to bring back the death penalty superimposed on an image of Mr. Burns tenting his fingers as he talks to a crowd

Smithers whispers in Mr. Burns's ear

Mr. Burns pushes Smithers away

Nancy Mace tweet: We truly belive if Tyler Robinson had ever sat down across from Charlie, the great debater, the man of faith and grace he was Tyler wouldn't have pulled the trigger superimposed on an image of a chastened Mr. Burns speaking to the crowd about a different subject

How fucked up is it that I kind of want the Brown family to do this so I can break the cycle of Bengals fandom?

What exactly are shoes and why do we wear them? For that, we turn to archaeology.

Calling it now: nothing but Black Sabbath covers.

This is the same Ted Cruz who had articles written about him by scientists trying to explain why his face creeps us out.

Took me a second to realize you meant a church and not, you know, the guy.

It's amazing how the sound effects just pop into my head when I read that name.

Great album.

@edyer411.bsky.social

I'm going with North Dayton Garden Center's famed 'Neighbor Beater' tomato.

I'm an American. Is it a rifle? I bet it's a rifle.

I was immediately able to find out what happened for the next 20 years after the show aired, so that was interesting. But it was a little unnerving seeing current pictures because to me it was like they'd aged two decades overnight.

A couple years ago I was watching Bands Reunited. As advertised, they found groups from the 80s to see if they'd do one last show. I kept thinking how everyone in the band Berlin looked pretty good considering how long it had been. Yeah, the episode was from 2004. I had no idea. It looked brand new.

Careful. You're going to bust that body.

If they ever make a pulled pork Hot Pocket I'd never leave the house.

The Breaking Bad logo edited to read Breaking Barrel. Perfect for damaged MAGA halfwits (but I repeat myself) who see a woke bogeyman in every corner and are quick to keyboard up for even the slightest of imagined slights.