Jerry-rigged

Remember with how out of touch with reality he is that he may genuinely think $2 of gas is what he emits after eating four McNuggets.

That’s very important to do from what I hear. I once had a roommate who wouldn’t put a raincoat on his worm and now his farm is no longer free range.

Well, I would’ve normally called a spade a spade anyways, but now that you said we should, it makes me think you had some other label in mind?

I think that might help explain why TikTok style comedy (and improv/standup) can often seem more spontaneously funny. The writer, performer, and person filming/editing are frequently all the same person, so there’s more of a singular vision of how each joke and bit is executed.

It’s much more difficult to execute successfully. The writer, director, actors, and editor all have to get each joke with the same or at least similar timing and energy. If any one person on board fails to “get it”, it falls flat. An action or horror can always cut to a visual that wows a crowd.

At what point will a collection of internationally renowned musical artists gather together to form a fundraising supergroup called “Africa for USA”?

“I miss you more with every shot I take” - Me alone at a bar looking at my ex’s Instagram and about to be cut off.

I genuinely thought that headline meant you were going to do a HDTGM on the Tim Hanks/Denzel Washington movie Philadelphia and that someone picked the wrong poster based solely on the races of the leads on it.

Yeah, but wasn’t this the man who thought VCR based board games like “Pile of Bullets” was going to be a big enough reason to quit his job at IBM??

Yeah, but wasn’t this the man who thought VCR based board games like “Pile of Bullets” was going to be a big enough reason to quit his job at IBM??

This is what the army of the Twelve Monkeys promised us.

I’m starting a conspiracy theory that McDonalds puts too much lettuce on a Big Mac to intentionally spill out of the box and distract from how small the sandwich actually is.

Pass it on.

Oh no! I was mixed up with National Buffalo day. Um, well, never mind, don’t open mine.

“I want it on my desk by the end of the day.”

“Yeah, you used to live there but had to move away when all the illegals came in and ruined the neighborhood. He’s just making it safe for you to move back, I can’t believe you aren’t grateful?!” -Some MAGA person probably

Two dollar bills

I can’t help but notice there are no posters of the original 1978 Halloween. Could there possibly be a story why your child isn’t a fan of that??
(Great set in Fairfield last week Patton!)

Jan 2025: Trump sworn in for a second presidential term and starts talking about making Canada the 51st state.

10 months later: Canada wins the World Series

Was that the motivation they needed? Elbows up Canada!

This is the “Let them eat Bitcoin” presidency.

This is clearly the “Let them eat Bitcoin” presidency.

You’re mistakenly thinking that the current US Secretary of Health and Human Services would actually read a published study about vaccines?

You know what’s one of the great things about the No Kings protests today?

No one is going to storm the U.S. Capitol.

When you’re making your #NoKings posters, remember… Donald Trump LOVES a good nickname.

White House Gives Wild Response To A Simple Question Asked By HuffPost Reporter A simple query about Trump's choice of location for his upcoming meeting with Russian President Vladimir Putin set off the president's spokespeople.

@bradleywhitford.bsky.social

Even Josh Lyman would not give such a foolish response to a genuine question, even if he was trying to form a secret plan to fight inflation:

www.huffpost.com/entry/white-...

@pattonoswalt.bsky.social FYI:
No Kings, Saturday, Westport CT 11 am-1 pm. Bridgeport CT 12:30-2pm.

Who are your top five presidents?

If Christopher Columbus were alive today and recreated his life’s biggest tasks, ICE would be locking him up and sending him away.

Thank you George. But, you know, I think it’d be ok if you ignored the sincerity in that and instead pretended this comment was something funny instead. That’d be ok too.

I don’t know how a young, up and coming politician trying to plan a career thinks aligning themselves with a cult centered around a lame duck almost octogenarian is a good long term strategy. Like, where do they see their constituents’ wants/needs in five years?