He said “you only live once and I’m gonna live or die trying”

My new planner arrived

I think car horns should know your intentions and make sounds accordingly

The thing about being a short girl is that I never want to take a tall man from a tall girl, but when a tall man is interested in me, I love the feeling of being ENGULFED

Me packing for a weekend trip to New York, packed with plans and friends, famously a city with plenty to do: better bring a sixth book just in case

Committing stolen valor by touring potential apartments in my thrifted Penn State hoodie

I bring a sort of “every single big narrative swing on Severance has done before” vibe that people who enjoy AppleTV shows don’t really like

Begyle decided that 7:36 on a Wednesday was the right time to start playing E•MO•TION front to back, and frankly they were right

My Oscar night story is that I only cried when Colman Domingo didn’t win

disturbing uptick in "we post tweets and talk about them." servile behavior tbh. bluesky is not the Greek chorus for the main character action of twitter, that's loser thinking, have some pride. twitter is dead. post bangers. thank you

19, I know my girl isn’t going above 20 this time

“How do you two want to do tabs tonight?”
“Yes”
“Open or closed?”
“yes”
“Do you have a nut allergy?”
“Ummm, yes please”

As a bartender, I wish more people went to theater school because folks out here are NOT listening to their scene partner (me)

Honking is both not enough and way too much

Bro it’s some of my best work

I love calling the ref stripes

Damn I thought Vikings knew how to sack

Was discussing the implications of a man’s hand on my ass with my coworker and she goes “maybe he thought- between the cheeks, doesn’t count!”

I did actually google two nights ago attempting to find out why we evolved to have two kidneys— I was unsuccessful :/

It’s so bananas how long you went without them, welcome to the future