Jamie McKay

Been siphoning a lot of stuff lately. Blood, oil, things of that nature. Important to have hobbies during these uncertain times.

Kemi Badenoch's spokesman claims the Conservatives are the "real opposition" to Labour.

Asked about a poll this week putting them in fourth place, he replies "that was one poll. There's another poll out today where we're not."

Journalist: "And where are you in that other poll?"

"Third"

Would just like to say that Billy Nomates has made the album
of the year. It’s utterly brilliant.

I see the triffids are quietly invading my local park again

The Lord of the Rings is a trilogy of epicfantasy adventure films directed by Peter Jackson.

Pictured here on set are Bilbo Baggins, Saruman, and Treebeard.

I don't 'refuse to use' AI, I just don't use AI; in the same way that I don't shoplift, or plagiarise other people's books - it requires no effort of will, it's just not something I would think of doing

A shot of a policeman from behind with a luminous green police vest and a matching Spar bag

I watched a documentary yesterday where my favourite bit was the out of context shot of a policeman with a policeman coloured Spar carrier bag

The La-hast of us

Rendezvous With Rama. Still stands so very tall amongst more recent “space” books.

I’m not classically educated, but I know a trap when I see one.

goldfish cracker with its freakish giant belly mouth

have you ever really thought about the scale and position of a goldfish cracker’s mouth if it was a real fish? it’s horrifying

A brown and black tabby cat with wide green eyes. He’s being held firmly as he has stolen half a hard boiled egg which is in his mouth.

One of my favourite ever lads: egg thief

It’s actually bad luck to say MK.gee at a concert, you have to call him ‘The Scottish guitarist’.

Photo of a book on a bookshelf in a shop. It’s by the late Pope Francis. Large picture of his head together with the word ‘Hope’.

Wow, what a horrific typo. Right on the cover.

A croissant with all the brown crust removed. It looks like a sad hunk of white foam

Someone on another site peels his croissants before eating them and France has demanded the UN step in to stop his crimes

I love my local Facebook group

I love my local Facebook group

I love that in Cornwall they have a gritter called Daphne Du Meltier.

Thanks Amazon. I didn’t know my wheelie bin was a receptionist until today.

1/ So, where were we? Oh yep, #duvetknowitschristmas. Firstly, some admin: Twitter/X has evidently been run into the ground by a preening, self-radicalised clot, so while there's a slim possibility that this annual celebration might be thriving over there, I won't know cos I won't be looking.

Does anyone remotely sensible know what’s going on with these drones? Because it’s getting really WEIRD.

🎵Stuck Outside Of Lidl With A Rear Flat Tyre Again🎵

Not sure about the logo of my new local Facebook group tbh

Here is a short story about a relationship.

My first thoughts on the new Kendrick Lamar album: it's about Northern Heights, the 1930s plan to extend the Northern line to Crouch End, Muswell Hill and Alexandra Palace. "Blinding lights and onstage fights - but will mankind ever reach those Northern Heights?" A question we're all still asking.

Trouble in Ramsbottom

lady of sophistication @janky_jane Props to anyone who tries to be fashionable in ireland i wore a red beret once in waterford and someone called me super mario Andrew Beatty V @AndrewBeatty Replying to @janky_jane I once ordered a taxi in Belfast for a night out. The driver pulls up to my house and just says "yer not going out like that. Go back in and change, I'll turn off the metre." | swear I was wearing normal jeans and a normal jacket.

Matthew @MrWeir Replying to @janky jane I once wore a silver jacket to college, turned up late for class, said 'sorry I'm late', lecturer said, 'that's ok' then waited til I was halfway across the front of the full class before following up with 'trouble with the spaceship again was it?'. Replying to @janky _jane My sister was in France sporting a new trench coat, thought was so stylish, but went into an Irish bar and got called Inspector Gadget by the first guy that saw her 15:53 • 8/16/21 • Twitter Web App

was wearing my super-fashionable short trench coat. My friend took one look at me wearing the jacket and said, "Where are we off to now. Columbo?" Eoin O Neill @eoinjoneill Replying to @janky_jane Was wearing a vintage nike jacket in a very long que for drinks at a boxing match when a Belfast lad goes "furk me this is taking forever, your man has been here since the 80's"

Loic Wright @dufflest Replying to @janky jane I wore a suit with a matching tie and pocket square to my first day of work at an advertising company (I thought I was going to be in Mad Men I guess) and the staff sent around and signed a communion card for me with a fiver in it. Eóin O Coileáin @L20_MTN Replying to @janky_jane I wore a white, wool turtle-neck jumper to the match once and a fella in the pub said 'Where have you parked the U-boat?'.

nobody does more brutal fashion reviews than the irish

YouTube video by The Blue Nile Official The Blue Nile - Tinseltown in the Rain (Official Audio)

Your actual Blue Nile being played at the Stadium of Light at half time. Easily the most thrilling moment of the evening so far.

I swear to god the only response to such a post from that man is this: