𝒄𝒓𝒖𝒎 𝒃𝒖𝒎

Happy birthday to one of my favourite haters, Charles Darwin

lloyd the replicant from blade runner getting increasingly pissed off by test questions

I Asked AI to Make My Beer Even Colder. The World Isn’t Ready for the Implications of What Happened Next

If there's one think the Trump administration loves it's endangering you, personally, every time you fly in a regular airplane

we put our faith in Beef Badsteak

Can't wait

RFK Jr. needs five portions of sload soap to help with his research. Here are 500 drakes. You can keep what is left after you purchase the sload soap.

To have one ICE employee arrested in in a Bloomington, MN underage sex trafficking sting may be regarded as a misfortune; to have two looks like carelessness.

Rep. Delia Ramirez to DHS officials: "I have as much respect for you as I do for the last white men who put on masks to terrorize communities of color. I have no respect for the inheritors of the Klanhood and the slave patrol. Those activities were criminal and so are yours."

This could potentially be an even more serious issue than the notorious “wardrobe malfunction” some years ago. As a member of the House of Representatives, I will be exercising my authority under Article I, Section 2 of the United States Constitution on this matter.

I find the lyrics of the Puerto Rican recording artist “Bad Bunny” to be disturbing and I will be opening a congressional inquiry on the matter.

this video is going to become real when it happens

Me and the first person who makes eye contact with me after it happens

I'm hearing from my sources that despite his handler's best efforts, the President has accidentally heard a sentence spoken aloud in Spanish, and has died. He is survived by his stupid children and demon wife. The carpet is being described as a "total loss"

this is what they're afraid will happen if they don't press 1 for english fast enough

This would be a pretty funny time for it to happen. They'd have to pause the game to announce it while struggling to remain somber

Donald Trump is like the Blade of pedophiles. He walks among them, he shares their strengths and cravings but none of their weaknesses, and sometimes he kills them. And he doesn’t pay his taxes.

I'm sorry the guy changing the rules on the fly is named what

From @acyn.bsky.social (posted on X)

"Reporter: Do any of you have a favorite animal?

Child: My favorite one is a gold snake that can move. It has gold eyes, and it has a super-duper tail…

Reporter: Mr. Mamdani, the second question for you.

Mamdani: Yes. It’s also the golden snake."

The real reason I'm leaving The Great British Baking Show Trump is threatening bombing the likes of which Tehran has never seen Prue Leith

the Spectator accidentally recycled a subhed from a previous day’s article about Tehran

But of that day and hour knoweth no man, no, not the angels of heaven, but the Father only. He sayeth it will be Awesome, though

⏳⌛️

There's a free opened bag of barley flour available on Nextdoor right now if anyone wants it

there was a version of this with tigers or leopards or something that had an insanely smooth beat over it but I've never been able to find it since. Lost, like tears in rain,

[upbeat zohran voice] I'm here at the Palace of Justice in Nuremberg, Germany, where 80 years ago some important progressive work started [smash cut] but hasn't ended. So here's what we're doing:

ph'nglui mglw'nafh Phil Gobbler's Knob wgah'nagl fhtagn