Tom

Fuck immunity, it's now mandatory to take a cricket bat to the vehicle by anyone passing within 500m.
And any wheelchair user has the obligation to key a giant cock & balls on the bonnet or have someone do it for them if they can't themselves.

Those look like rather little feet

You know what, I can understand the guy trying to throttle it.

Now stay with me here. If landlords hadn't bought up every property they could as an "asset" those properties would now be owned by the people living in them.
You provide nothing and instead are actively making this world a worse place.

Didn't watch, didn't listen but I'm not going to let a little thing like that get in my way. McGregor was magnificent for the full 90. And when he whipped of his kit and went steaming into the Reading end of the Arkells in just his y-fronts he reminded me of Harrold Fleming in 22.

And remember the binding vote was 70% woo-woo

Oh no, I think I might be secretly rich.

I'm tall enough to reach the top of cupboards. I'm pretty certain this is my only selling point. As long as women never hear about step ladders I may be safe.

Did Crisp Rat's character have a single thought pass through his head in the entire franchise?

Honestly a big part of why we're so overweight is because both my wife & I completely fail at only cooking for 2. It's just so much harder than cooking for 4+.

I want to say north Atlantic fellas organisation but I refuse to google it twice in one life time. Definitely completely normal and not at all sad hashtag creeps

I will never give up my Ivor Dewdney's. Oggie oggie oggie!

I'm not sure toilet wine after your discovery in there the other day would be the best plan.

I only use mine to hypothetically watch football but never had any problems with proton. Never signed up to the fee paying tier and only dropped out twice in the last year I've used it.

Going off how long various work colleagues have spent out on a "5 minute" ciggie break down the years that should give you plenty of time for a leisurely stroll to a hospital 3 towns over.

I'm absolutely certain this looks like a pokemon but I have no clue which.

I thought you meant you were an MP or something and then was like oh phew just an unwanted dream pregnancy.

Ok, a Roman arsonist could just go do the funniest thing possible right now...

This seems like the perfect plan. I can see absolutely nothing possibly going wrong.

Sounds like your joggers want to stay on the couch

He's putting extremists in power because he's actively chasing their votes.

I know precisely nothing about Canadian politics but the fact the guy who was predicted to be the next PM is now going to lose his seat entirely is fucking hilarious to me.

Well licking Boxer, Fearless or Invincible never did me any harm.

Worlds gone mad

Kavanaugh will never have scored an easier hattrick in his life & Wright needs a serious bollocking for it.
Kirkman very unlucky to be subbed off, Ameen did well in each position he was played in though.

PotM Smith for his 2 goals then, far more importantly, the piss take after the OG.

Why do they specifically need to mention @freepearn.bsky.social was in?

That's what calendars are for

I maintain the vast majority of us would.

At best most of the people I fucked up with my powers would be evil. But there'd still be plenty who'd just annoyed me.
And that's not even taking into account all the shit I'd steal just cos.

But they do get "paid" now. So the argumentative little shit was right.

Raising Arizona exists and yet there's still absolute wronguns going ooh Nick Cage can't act.

MotM Butterworth. His 2 runs were the only good thing to happen the whole game.