ramblingflan

If you get a bill, you’re still alive.

Pretty sure my body's a car. Every time I take it in for a quick oil change, I leave with a long list of needed repairs. Now I'm knocking them out one by one.

Had a stent placed in my heart. Not sure if I survived or died and went to Hell. How is one supposed to tell the difference? 🤔

Send this to the birthday person if you think they need it in their life [ #foundmedia #weirdcore #wtf ]

Spaghetti-Os on a plate that have somehow retained the shape of their can. Also there's a lit candle wick in it

Set the perfect, romantic mood with the Spaghetti-Os candle!
[ #foundmedia #importantimages #memes #spagettios ]

Definitely that, plus a bunch of dithered Samantha Fox GIFs with phone numbers for someone's two-line 9600baud BBS

Email from 23andMe View your unread Bunions report

nah i'm good
thanks tho

More a reframing of one I've been struggling with. I think looking at it this way will help me through it.

facing a "greater of two kindnesses" choice

i know what i want
i know what i should want
the question is how to weight the deciding formula

the result may be the same regardless
but the endgame will be different

thanks for nothing too 😒

Says he's looking for a no-strings-attached relationship, but I don't believe him

When your face meets camera, it's always a win regardless of angle

Screenshot showing an Amazon customer service bot processing a refund of $0.

thanks for nothing 😒

Yep, they're scheduling it now. I'm going to ask them to decorate my insides for Halloween while they're in there.

a man is holding a microphone and saying oh my god oh the humanity . ALT: a man is holding a microphone and saying oh my god oh the humanity .

D'oh. A complication with my bile duct requires follow-up ERCP, which is not to be confused with WKRP.

YouTube video by Saberman RetroNews Commodore 64 -=GallBlazer=-

Many thanks to Dr. @pacbilly.bsky.social 👨‍⚕️ for providing me video of my surgery
youtu.be/E7DOCw1vTWg?...

Oof. They weren't joking when they said there might be some pain for a few days ⚡

Operation successful, probably. I'm about 50 grams lighter now without my gallbladder. I do not recommend including this approach in your own slimming plan.

A pair of silver earrings above the following ad copy: Etsy Silver Sperm Stud Earrings, Snake Stud Earrings - Sterling Silver [ESV1042] Sponsored

Ok which one of you sponsored this 🙄

No history that I'm aware of, so I think I'm breaking new ground. Good luck with the dietary changes! At one point in my life I weighed nearly 300lbs, and most of my subsequent weight loss came down to eating better and drinking more water. Never did any drastic caloric restriction.

(Medical report) IMPRESSION: Cholelithiasis

Well that's not something I expected. They haven't spoken with me about it yet, but apparently it means I have gallstones. That may explain the pain I often have after eating.

A social worker is trying to arrange somewhere to go. It's tough when the shelter system's already been overloaded for a while, and now faces an influx of refugees from the homeless crackdown in DC.

Still receiving care, though I may be discharged a little later today. Someone is advocating for keeping me longer so I don't have to finish recuperating on the street, but I doubt that's something the doctor in charge and Medicaid would approve.

Me: Can I remove this bandage?
Him: If you want to bleed
Me: Okay *starts removing the bandage*
Him: Wait!

A new doctor has appeared, and he looks like the creator of Star Wars. That's reassuring. George Lucas definitely never messed anything up.

Yes and no. Figuring it out. Good news is the bleeding isn't anything to be too concerned about.

Maybe I'm ready to go back to having no doctors.

Handsome man waiting inside a medical examination room. His left eye is droopy.

Them: You're back
Me: I am
Them: Same reason?
Me: Yes but also no

It stopped again. No answers yet except that it's not kidney stones.

Sitting at the town square. An unhoused senior, a Chinese immigrant who came here many years ago and worked hard raising a family, stands near the fountain doing Tai Chi alone as the sun sets. She does the same forms every day and I almost have them memorized. Soon I'll ask to join her.

Not sure if it'd be the same issue for you, but I had that happen once at my old place and reseating all of the black disks (whatever they're called) that sit in the middle of the burners fixed it for me.