Aunt Chelle

I've never really been the personality type but sometimes it's nice to take a break from doing and saying anything there is

in his defense the baby wouldn’t stop crying

He doesn’t know what a Coke oven is, does he?

The old lean and stare move. I am merely furniture.

got a feeling that today's the day I get answers

Happy Thanksgiving to everyone hiding in a bathroom as long as possible to escape family who you can hear asking where you are.

starting a fight in the family group chat about how to pronounce pecan

Here’s what you do. You just FOLD IT IN.

The phone rings, in the middle of the night.
My father yells: Why can’t your boyfriend text, like a normal person?

Reason number 38 why I never wrote a hit song, for Cyndi Lauper.

That NWSL Final was fire! Love the energy of this league.

I love in the NWSL how the USWNT players all check in on each other when they fall down, even if they’re on opposite pro teams. And I love how in the WNBA, even if you won six Olympic gold medals with somebody, you will run through them like a tornado if they’re on the other team and in your way.

Just…
FOLD IT IN

a woman is holding a bowl of food and talking to a man who says " you just fold it in " Alt: A Schitts Creek gif in which Moira tells David to fold in the cheese

Time to dust off those recipes, everybody

Me: I just love us, as a people.

Stacy: Humans??

Me: What, no. Gays.

Happiness is a bald fade with a hard disconnect.

Josie, tabby kitten, standing upright on a shelf in the bathroom linen closet.

Josie kitty walking like an Egyptian #Caturday

A startled looking Cattle Egret. The buff colored plumes on its head are standing up, lending it a shocked aspect.

This Cattle Egret’s reaction when I told it that some people on the left are buying into Marjorie Taylor Greene’s personality rehab stunt.

people giving cover by breaking down the acceptable levels of child abuse should be launched into the sun

According to HR it's not appropriate to tell a coworker that they talked enough for everybody when asked if I had anything to add to the teams meeting

A black and white cat is inside a house, looking out of a window at an orange tabby cat with a collar, which is standing on its hind legs and appearing to angrily shout through the glass.

“Tell Alice I just want to talk!”
“She doesn’t want to see you, Carl.”

I would walk 500 miles and I would walk 500 more just to see a new bird.

Our cat clock keeps perfect time.

Arlo, a white Great Pyrenees dog, smells the foot bones of a plastic skeleton a person is holding on a porch on Halloween, with much apprehension

Arlo remains suspicious of Halloween, as the "trick or treat, smell my feet" method determined these were not even real bones

My ladies demand we bring back murder by brooch.

You know what's even less than finite? A finite for a limited time only deal from the drive thru of what we can handle.

If you see this, post a chef:

A cat stares at a large framed oval painting of a similar-looking cat in military dress.

Marvin stared at the painting of his great grandfather, who had survived two wars, worked three jobs to support his fourteen children, and eventually died saving a box full of kittens from a fire, and thought to himself, "You know, if I knocked that over, I could sleep on it."

Following your dreams becomes easier as you get older and downgrade them from lofty ambitions like winning the Super Bowl to more realistic goals like finding a nice pair of warm, comfy slippers for the winter.

Two cats on a cat tower. Magic, a black cat, hangs over the side of a hammock, slapping at Josie, a tabby cat, below.

#Caturday squabbles