raindro

ok but can i bring a bottle of vodka

ok nerd

skbity bee bob im drunk

where’s my phone

sometimes i drop my food on the floor and eat it

to the tune of shaggy it wasnt me

welcome to the real world jerry

i’m just like the grinch in the sense that if idk what to wear or my clothes don’t feel right i will just decide to not go somewhere

yeah, your titties are great. what that brain do tho?

I don’t want pity sex but I’m offended that it’s not on the table

oh good. as long as you know i will be okay, i think

i hate my fucking life. ttfn

blokey blokes are the bane of many existence

this is a fair analysis. im a mid clear as day

its always 5 o'clock somewere in the midwest

ok fair, i think. im trusting you since im not sure off the top of my head what this song is about

the universe has righted this wrong

i’m not a good boy
i’m not a bad boy
i’m a mid boy

if there is any justification for being drunk by 3:30 its the midwest

no

it has def helped weed out the shitheads

this is directly directed at @dly.bsky.social because.. well she knows. or maybe she doesnt, because im hella low on the food chain. anywho. heres some stupid internet shit.

if i realize that i misread a skeet after i reply then idk, figure it oot bud

oh, so like my eating, but not like my smoking of the marijuana

intermittent fasting in hour-long intervals

who is thoren bradley and why would i let him try to fuck me

beleive it or not this is about bananas

Waffles are just like pancakes, just batter.

calling my most masculine friends good girl so i know whether or not they should still be my masculine friends

did i say bad bitch because yeah, im a bad bitch