(h)elle woods, j.d.

Texas flag: Don't Mess With Texas? Chicago flag: Fuck You We're From Chicago

The stars are ratings. We’ll eat the Texas Guard for lunch.

What are they protecting, Portillos?

The girls are fightingggg!

Everything is happening so fast. I actually had to sit down and calendar stuff today.

Y'all. I officially have my first clients.

Plz clap.

And send moral support because this is terrifying.

Since you can't use the bathrooms either, maybe shit in your hands and call it a sandwich 🤷🏼‍♀️

Forever and ever.

I'm going to be in court so much, I'm already pre-exhausted.

Oh no. How will you see his shit takes now?

I was absolutely born to be the chaotic half of a couple that throws the most interesting dinner parties, and it is an absolute injustice that that is not my reality.

Clown shoe wearing ass bitch...

Only 10,000? 😥

I love this.

El oh el, the resisters™️ are out today. Rip to your mentions.

The legal system most certainly does NOT treat everyone equally. Thanks for dreaming big, though.

I'd rather not have to wait for history to recognize anything. I'd rather you feckless bastards in government call it what it is and put your lives and livelihoods on the line the way so many of the people have been doing. But there's no profit in that, huh?

Like Catholicism, you have to be born into the White Sox. No one likes the weird adult converts.

I get out of training, walk home, somewhat catch up on the day's events, and then I'm absolutely done for the day. Cooking dinner is a struggle, let alone anything fun.

Please, and then someone pro hac me or whatever in to that court.

I think the world is a big part of it.

My kid, an alum, told me about this last night. I really hope the school is able to continue, hopefully with new leadership, because this place has been chaotic for years and it's the students that suffer.

Apparently, it's weird that I wear heels to court 🤷🏼‍♀️

That's even generous...

A number of life's problems can be traced back to Lake Forest, Illinois...

el oh el, bro, come here...

I wouldn't even need to take off my hoops...

They just extended the road closure another block for the NYCHA building that exploded today, but it's the south Bronx, so that's going about as well as you'd expect...

Always befriend your neighbors so when you buy new suits and Banana Republic splits the order and sends half to you in the Bronx and half to your old place in Boston, your neighbor in Boston will mail your package to you in the Bronx.

Is anyone finding joy anymore?

"In an email to a PJP editor, a spokesperson from the New Jersey DOC said the state prison system has a 'comprehensive language assistance policy' in line with federal civil rights requirements."

Translation services, in my experience, suck. Our clients deserve so much better.

Okay. Someone somewhere was threatened. I'm convinced.