E.D.D.I.E.z

one of those days again, call me when spring has sprung

Things that make you go, “HURM”

there was a memory lapse earlier but I couldn't tell but I think there may of been some kind of memory lapse

YouTube video by 977Radio Joe Strummer - Bhindi Bhagee

dentrassi chicken tikka tonight
www.youtube.com/watch?v=SZiP...

i’ll be hella hammered when the almighty thaw finally gets here

nothing complicated tonight, just an easy stir-fry

squawk the squawk, do you stork the stork?

...and this is where the magic happens
[gestures to room with pentagram]

it's life jim, but i wouldn’t touch yours with a klingon’s dick

that’ll leave an abstain

My sauce isn’t secret. I just don’t advertise it.

feelin’ extra what the actual fuckish today

Some food spelling out asshole for an asshole.

I will sometimes be a bit much for my wife to bear. Nothing specific, but there will be signs.

if monday was a person i would leave them on read

Goat man lighting candles in a blackout.

SAFETY TIP: in case you lose power in the storm, candles are a popular backup source of light.

Remember: place candles on a flat surface to prevent tipping, and stagger placement to prevent heat buildup.

Which ritual sacrifice is it to be one of those positive vibes only people?

All obligatory blessings and casual curses.

the downside to being a healer, is dressing your own wounds

got a 14oz bottle of bay rum aftershave on the way and I’m prepared to have panties flying my direction during the foreseeable future

Who needs boner pills when there’s garlic bread?

tgif amirite? (tugjobs given in friendzone)

I’m going to have to throw away all these Antifa business cards aren’t I?

If you are on antidepressants you should be called a pillgrim. 🌞

I’d like an Oscar for Best Friend.

I will take a literal shit on his grave

it was beautiful weather for a run today, but some celery soup I made gave me diarrhea, so here I sit

Drag queen with an amazing voice but terrible teeth:

Mariah Caries

one mood away from getting a tattoo that says eyebrows on my forehead

I wrote you a letter, but I just couldn't muster the energy to write you a whole word.

Sexting though your car Bluetooth in rush hour traffic is diabolical.