erin

the boy ceo just toasted a client with a wine glass full of milk... this is CULTURE

i had to tell gio who dhar mann was because of this and now we're watching a dhar mann video called "world's smartest boy has NO FRIENDS" where an ad agency hires a boy ceo and one of their employees gets so mad and keeps yelling like "NO NO NO! we CAN'T have a BOY as a CEO"

i said "growlanser is the spiritual successor to langrisser" and gio was like "that's like the opposite of 'cellar door'"

i’m gonna start saying “how do you do.” that’s a cool question

the people in my overnight oats facebook group are knives out 24/7 in a way that is shocking. somebody will be like “tried my oats with unsweetened vanilla almond milk today… didn’t love it!” and they’ll get 30 comments like “i hope you fucking die janice. this is your last overnight”

earth’s biggest idiot leon kennedy still delivering snappy one-liners to the bosses even after they’ve mutated into like a big scorpion with an eyeball coming out of its stinger or whatever… hold on to your sparkle king 🙏

rolled credits on resident evil 4 remake… man that’s video games

No-one should have to go through what I did just to build a simple koi pond #HeavenIsForRealMovie

all the cbs stuff is dumb but if they’re bringing casey lewis on to do the same tiktok trend reporting she does in her newsletter to a normal and offline audience, that is going to be hilarious. we’re going to have a different tide pods scare every week now. momo is gonna be back

local dumbass Sees Lights

when are you moving out btw

i cannot go on like this lmfao

Ok I have to share this actually.

they’ll never make me learn to dodge in a video game. get hit or go home imo

Oh, not AGAIN!

i remember one of theirs years ago that had two hosts and i *swear* they had scripted laughter at each other’s jokes. it felt like having dinner with a couple who were trying to hide that they’d been arguing right before you arrived

i cannot listen to an audiobook where i feel like the narrator is reading a book to me. i can only listen to one if i feel like the narrator is talking to me. this is also why i can’t listen to wondery podcasts (which always make it obvious that the bored-sounding host is reading a script to me)

we literally never needed chatgpt the technology was within us all along abcnews.go.com/amp/Business...

does anyone remember that thing in the mid 00s where you could text a question to a number and some random person would answer it

was deleting a backlog of old voicemails off of my phone today and found a really haunting dispatch from yesteryear... not sure what was going on here

i appreciated his honesty

one time i was on an overnight megabus going across central pennsylvania during a blizzard and as we slid down the highway in near total darkness the driver got on the intercom and said “this is gonna be a rough one folks, i don’t know about this”

have we as a culture learned nothing from the travesty that is goodreads

i like in resident evil when you run into a new monster that’s half man half centipede or whatever and you’re like uhh what the hell was that, and then two rooms later you find “Note from Umbrella Researcher” and it says “our team has synthesized a new subject. We’re calling it Centipede Man”

Walked into a Taco Bell cantina and instantly got this notification