Harold Turismo

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Cool personal project I've been working on. It's live now, but you're the first person to know that. Launching properly tomorrow.

The group bike ride for Alex Pretti is about to depart in Minneapolis, stopping at his memorial, then Renee Good’s, and finishing at the VFW. If you can join, hop on anywhere. It’s a warm 17° & sunny!

I’ve never seen this many cyclists for a group ride. ⚡️✊🏽⚡️🚲⚡️✊🏽⚡️ #RIPPretti

there are people who claim that Terry Pratchett would have been a TERF if he was still alive

to them I say two things:

1. are you fucking serious

2. go fuck yourselves

Sat at my desk crying with laughter at one section of disco elysium and my coworker just sent me a message asking how I'm feeling. Lady i am bathed in the golden rays of stately grandeur. Like a late summer's day. Like a Daddy-O

You telling me this fructose corn syrup got high?

touching sea grass

Kamala Harris just let out the craziest laugh sitting on her couch. She hasn't seen the news yet, she just does that

We're doing mandatory heat safety awareness and somebody just asked "how can I stop myself going for a jog when it's excessively hot?"

Finally, a wordle for the dudes.

YOU - I don't want to be this kind of animal anymore.

Congrats to Mikey Miles on his first catering gig

My kids is checking which of his toy horses have penises to determine where they're allowed to go. Strongest sign yet that he has British genes.

A cat rolling on the ground. He's ginger and white and cat connoisseurs may be able to tell that he's 16 years old. Only true cat experts can place his origin to West London, however.

A Harold. Just a man.

Sun's out, boys out

The TV President will be followed by the Videogame President. Microtransactions everywhere, promoting some soldier to Big Boss.

"Daddy are you trying to take care of the environment so it doesn't end?"
- I'm trying to
"But you're not"
- Are YOU trying to?
"I'm making good excuses"

If you're still in line to get sliced in half by Zatoichi, STAY IN LINE

this zatoichi is something else. guy can't see shit and he's still the best swordman in town. gives an incredible massage too. anyway me and a few local dipshits are gonna go take him out, pretty easily i figure

The album cover of the stone roses debut in a frame

On this day in 1989 The Stone Roses released their debut album - one of the greatest records of all time. 10/10

The weights kicked my ass clean off my body tonight, but I needed that ass kicking. One lift from equalling my deadlift PB.

My cool hand holding a Bang Energy drink in peach mango flavor. I am wearing a Timex T80 watch in vaporwave colors, a blue striped jersey shirt, oversized 1950s style navy dress pants, and Goro Majima's shoes. I appear to be in an office environment, but that cannot be correct because no man demonstrating all these signifiers of luxury (especially the Bang Energy drink) could possibly have to demean himself by working for a living.

I started drinking these ironically because someone on Twitter was always joking about them, but now I'm all in. It's a healthy way to start the day. All the chemicals in it can be found in nature.

Screenshot of an unsolicited sales email. It begins: Hi I came across your website and read about your cycling news and humor. I work at Wishpond, helping cycling news and humor websites grow their audience and boost engagement.

This sales outreach feels like they're following shitty pick up artist advice. Oh, you're into [cycling news and humor]? I love to [cycling news and humor]!

watching the reality game show on netflix called secret millionaire and I feel like every person on the show looks like someone else that has been on tv. this made me think maybe we’ve seen what all people could possibly look like at this point.

"The Slot machine pays out the jackpot"

The 2020 win feels like it didn't really happen to me, with so much else going on in the world and my personal life at the time. This time I'm going to be fully present (thousands of miles away) and enjoying every minute.

Decorated my living room with LFC gear for today and got my shirt out. It's a long time since I've done that, mainly because it seems to makes them lose, but today feels big

The enemy of my enemy is really spicing up this polycule

The most startling TV fact I ever learned is that the Golden Girls were supposed to be 37 years old

It was alright actually