Scare Blair

tools of the trade 😸🎉

*eats chip on my shoulder

hahaha *shitdisturber* as number 1 bullet point at top of my resume 🤩😈

hehehe nope 😸

Present day horror reboot of Supermarket Sweep where they go around the store screaming at the prices

You’re under the weather? We all are, idiot. It’s in the sky.

*puts old wooden coffee table in the woods* you’re free now

i lived mas, please respond

Please appropriate our culture
- frogs

This No Kings rally could have been a national election

be the off putting you want to see in the world

hannibal lecter's favorite sandwich is organ grinder

A cat is handcuffed by one paw with tiny pink cuffs to a fallen piece of furniture.

“My lawyer will have me out in an hour.”

gorgeous man!

I've only been blocked once in the last 2 days. You guys feeling okay?

A cat stares at a large framed oval painting of a similar-looking cat in military dress.

Marvin stared at the painting of his great grandfather, who had survived two wars, worked three jobs to support his fourteen children, and eventually died saving a box full of kittens from a fire, and thought to himself, "You know, if I knocked that over, I could sleep on it."

Who called it singing out loud in the car when seat belting was right there?

if i wake up in pain i wasn't in when i went to sleep, i just assume i fought the monster under the bed. clearly i won, because it's gone

masterbating everyone else

self control is highly over rated

i really need to learn how to scream my apathy out loud

my bitterness lasts right through the cold season just like an evergreen

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH

the human brain is wild man how am i still able to feel surprised after the year weve had

especially freshly baked chocolate chip cookies 😈

everything really brings the worst out in me

🥰😸

it used to be possession but now interpretation of the law is 9/10th of guilt

If I ever ran into a talking Gecko I'd stomp it into oblivion.

Genie: are you sure?

Me: positive

Genie: nobody prepared me for this shit

<later>

Announcer: and here comes “The Shaft” and I’ve got to tell you, this is one of the strangest things we’ve ever seen. A man with a bat for a penis