average boygirl

unfortunately until this dumbass website lets you have private accounts no one see any particular identifying or inflammatory thoughts here. oppressing me.

the 300 character limit is really important to me

on some serenity prayer shit rn wrt virus everyone has atm that seems like it would only ruin my life specifically due to my unfortunate genetics. it is obviously stressing me out and its frustrating for a fear to be rational and still have to try ignore it bc it’s normal. watching anime on valium

for someone who has spent more of their life in solitude I can’t find any meaning from it. It just feels like being unstuck in time, not existing until I am in the presence of another person again. I am solely socially motivated I guess which sucks when everyone can give you a disabling disease

E.T., the desperate gnome, came to Earth to observe our diseases

the bottom of the barrel has the best stuff. you're gonna want to get in there and scrape for sure

Kurt Vonnegut tells his wife he's going out to buy an envelope: "Oh, she says, well, you're not a poor man. You know, why don't you go online and buy a hundred envelopes and put them in the closet? And so I pretend not to hear her. And go out to get an envelope because I'm going to have a hell of a good time in the process of buying one envelope. I meet a lot of people. And see some great looking babies. And a fire engine goes by. And I give them the thumbs up. And I'll ask a woman what kind of dog that is. And, and I don't know. The moral of the story is — we're here on Earth to fart around And, of course, the computers will do us out of that. And what the computer people don't realize, or they don't care, is we're dancing animals. You know, we love to move around. And it's like we're not supposed to dance at all anymore."

Kurt Vonnegut man

middle aged men love to hand you their unlocked work phone and leave, and otherwise leave you at the computer in room alone for extended periods with their work emails on screen.

woah who is making these videos? I need to learn how to sing in this voice

the thing about having 50-100 weird man coworkers that you meet and interact with 1-on-1 is that you can start to make associations and sort them into categories based on traits. you are all my little funko pops…I am out here creating entirely new horoscopes based on Guys.

on the phone to his boss. it was beautiful.

tradies who are nerds are saying shit like “I’ll reconvene with you, bro”

this mf using the discover tab

get those onion goggles on him

I an already emotionally vulnerable this week….just got told I will be with him until Monday

he is watching videos with no headphones

something wrong with you 🩷

I fear I am talking too honestly with my coworkers recently but I did get to hear the story of last time guy was under a house his apprentice screamed and he thought he had been shocked. he was actually being attacked by a rat that had crawled up into his pants via the leg hole. very funny

my mornings have been ruined this week by having soy milk but no weetbix. they may be a carrier pigeon with a ziploc bag solution for us here

oh your neighborhood has five guys burgers? haha yeah I guess that does sound like a lot of guys

I warned you about the crimes bro. I told you dog

we should. and we will.

A Better World Is Possible (me and my buddies digging a really deep hole)

community guerrilla gardening project except it’s just a bunch of people hobby tunnelling on public land. one need not become a property owner in order to act on their inherent desire to secretly tunnel deep into the earth. we could have it all

can only microdose processing in the form of a brief and often public catharsis. as a little treat

occasionally seeing people and things that remind me of my dead friends and starting to silently cry in situations that are often joyful/not sad is something i really enjoy. I kind of think it rules. it makes me feel closer to them that they are still everywhere

having to wear disposable gloves to put on my compression stockings so I don’t tear them with the rough skin of my hands has me feeling like some kind of cartoon brute

38 year old guys are saying “I’ve been looking forward to eating this apple all day”

Its Just One Of Those Days I said when I took my cat home from the vet ($800) today and he had sloppy poos in carrier after sedation that he spread all around the house as he stumbled around as I tried to wipe him clean while rushing to get ready for work. I was right. more floor poo when i got home