tess

hello? is there anyone on this app?

hello i haven't posted here in ages, is it worth coming back? what's up? how's everyone doing?

not traumatised, just unlucky

told my psychologist about some irrational fears/magical thinking and she said "noooo you've had so much bad luck already, i don't think that you'll get any more" OK didn't realise we were operating in a luck based economy

staying here cos there are two grown men with golden retrievers and leaving would mean walking alone in the park for a bit which im not keen on with the dog shooting man i rejected, yknow?

uh oh i forgot it got dark early so the sun went down on my way to the park and now i gotta stay here cos a man approached me and when i ignored him he started wandering around pretending to shoot the dogs

sending love to all my Dead Mum Club pals this week! the constant reminders and advertisements will be over in a few days! you got this, i got this, we can get through it 💕

every 7 years my mums birthday falls on mothers day and it is like a little gift from the universe to me, so it's just one big grief day and not two in the same week 🤗

i know, it's very minor and it's personal, not policy! but my candidates are socialists, greens, libs, labor, one nation - my numbering feels like an easy choice, even knowing that Labor will win the seat, so at least i think the Labor candidate is a decent person

it's my first time in this electorate (safe Labor seat) and while i am not voting her first, i do think fondly of the Labor member because of the one time I sold her second hand buttons to fix her blazer. it's minor, but I love anyone who values repairs, especially doing it themselves?

it wasn't even a urgent repair, it was just the bathroom sink not working and idk, im grateful! i will always say that social supports can and should be better, wider spread, and available to more people, but i am still INCREDIBLY grateful for the ones im currently receiving

i feel like every repair I've requested in a private rental has been stress that they'll raise the rent if you ask for repairs, a week of them not replying to multiple "my bathroom is unusable" emails, and then you get a random phone call from a plumber. do better!!!

my current flat is rented through a community housing organisation and not to boast but i just had a repair fixed within 24 hours of me notifying them, which is something i have NEVER experienced in a private rental

my sink, my phone, and my fan, all breaking in the same 24 hours that im having all my old furniture dropped off feels like a personal attack! god's hardest battles, strongest soldiers, etc etc

girl at the pub asked if anyone had any painkillers.... have never felt more needed or useful. please, i have five types to choose from, take what you need

"heinous loser" is a great insult, thank u Pedro Pascal

something I really appreciate about Pascal is that he's using his position - which is very secure, he's hugely successful and they're not going to throw away a bunch of money firing him - to be this outspoken

it's important that everyone speak out on trans rights but especially big names

she's been considering becoming an Anne Geddes baby for the past few days and today was the closest she's ever gotten!

anyway sorry about that depressing series of tweets, here is my little cuddle buddy to say thank u for reading ✨

*broken record voice*: i was referred to a grief counsellor at one point and looooved being able to talk about my mum for an hour every fortnight but then she dumped me because i was "too traumatised" to do grief therapy. fucking wild!

didn't even get to talk through my mum having a terminal illness because she lied about it being terminal so i didn't know. that in itself is so fucked up it feels like i need a thousand therapy sessions to work through, but nope! apparently talk about other stuff instead

i feel like both of those things are things people WITHOUT severe mental illness go to therapy for, yknow? but i dont get to talk them through because there's always something more pressing the therapist wants to deal with. feels unfair tbh! feels hard to move through!

wild that i went through both my mum dying and my partner of 9 years calling off our relationship without warning and have barely spoken about either in therapy because there has always been something more pressing/urgent to talk about. like what the fuck!

i am going into mourning after i finish my last couple

not to boast but i was sooo good at getting drive through covid tests. i'd let them shove that thing right up my nose, no reaction. wish that skill could be used in my everyday life

hope you're all good. love to you all! hang in there

to be clear - i had full support of their parents to do this! i have a good relationship with their parents and have been invited to see them, i am simply just not well enough and it's a big sore grief hole in my heart. was nice to be able to make even a little bit of contact today.

made lil easter boxes with a couple of eggs n a note from me to drop off for my niece n nephew today. it's been almost a year since i've seen or spoken to them (after being in their lives since before they were born, 9 years) and i miiiiss them!

accidentally crying a bit at the dog park BUT it beats crying at home i guess?

ooft, i always think i have the 'memories' feature pretty locked down so it doesn't show me upsetting shit, but then it'll hit me with an "on this day" and it's a milkshake with two straws aka the lamest n most bleak thing i can imagine