Wayne Hepner

#IfIWereToLiveInBikiniBottom

I already live in Bikini Bottom I'm Spongebobs Pet Snail

#IfIWereToLiveInBikiniBottom I'd be careful not to track sand in.

#IfIWereToLiveInBikiniBottom I'd be a diaphragm, because they don't make the sponge any more.

#IfIWereToLiveInBikiniBottom you'd never know, because I'd still wear a shirt instead of the top.

#EmotionalElixirs Sauternine

#EmotionalElixirs despair nectar

#EmotionalElixirs Champagne for real pain

#EmotionalElixirs a beer after my own heart - cold, dark and bitter.

two cats are sitting on a white couch and one is standing on its hind legs ALT: two cats are sitting on a white couch and one is standing on its hind legs

#OddReasonsForADuel
Didn't like the cut of your jib.

a man and woman are running from a train with the words ah a duel how very delightful on the bottom ALT: a man and woman are running from a train with the words ah a duel how very delightful on the bottom

#OddReasonsForADuel its Sunday.

PLEASE read this one. Kinda required reading. If you agree, which I hope you do, print in color and magnetically attach to your refrigerator. It is marvelous and very clear to all who visit: this is what we stand for. PERIOD.

#OddReasonsForADuel well, the Ringmaster hypnotizes people with his hat so his gang can rob them, and it worked on Spider-Man, but not on Daredevil because he's secretly blind.

#OddReasonsForADuel you called a Firefly an upstart

#CandyGumsInASongOrMovie Magic Mike & Ike

#CandyGumsInASongOrMovie Hey Bazooka Joe

Just got an email notice from me bridge club. From now on the dominant suit will be called wanker instead of Trump.

Study: 89% Of Husbands Planning To Surprise Wife On Valentine’s Day By Dressing As Naked, Chubby Cherub

Study: 89% Of Husbands Planning To Surprise Wife On Valentine’s Day By Dressing As Naked, Chubby Cherub https://theonion.com/study-89-of-husbands-planning-to-surprise-wife-on-val-1823006999/

#Superman

What is a goldenrod?

Often, when an old person is still alive, a library is already lost somewhere among a Library of Alexandria sized heap of shit you already heard. Fortunately, we're all more redundant than we like to think.

Often, when an old person is still alive, a library is already lost somewhere among a Library of Alexandria sized heap of shit you already heard. Fortunately, we're all more redundant than we like to think.

Often when an old person is still alive a library is already lost somewhere among a Library of Congress sized heap of shit you already heard. Fortunately, we're all more redundant than we like to think.

Often when an old person is still alive a library is already lost somewhere among a Library of Congress sized heap of shit you already heard. Fortunately, we're all more redundant than we like to think.

Often when an old person is still alive a library is already lost somewhere among a Library of Congress sized heap of shit you already heard. Fortunately, we're all more redundant than we like to think.

#DoNotForget Your safeword

a close up of a monster with horns and a scarf around his neck . ALT: a close up of a monster with horns and a scarf around his neck .

#DoNotForget me when I'm Gorn

#DoNotForget to do something special for Valentine's Day!