Bucky Barnes and Noble ♔

“The money’s not in the cure, the money’s in the medicine!”

Your avi…lemme see it…

They played in her face cuz she showed out in that movie

Pineapple

I said to my bf “I can’t wait until my thighs don’t touch anymore” and he looked at me like I said I can’t wait to kill him in his sleep lol. I just want my pants to last past 3 months 😩

Mine dead and gone chile lol

a man in a black hat is sitting in a car Alt: a man in a black hat is sitting in a car

My metabolism at 26:

“Grown woman weight” and it’s just my metabolism gave up on me 😩

I don’t think it would be so bad if I didn’t hate the way men describe “grown woman weight.” They be like “ooh when she got stretch marks and cellulite 😮‍💨”
EXCUSE ME?!?!

I’m still trying to get rid of mine 😭

If I would’ve gotten caught tryna forge my mamas signature I would’ve just got off punishment last week. I am 37 years old lol.

I remember I thought one of my kindergarteners tried to forge his dad’s signature. Then his dad came in and wrote something for some of my other students and it was clear that his dad just had terrible handwriting 🥴

Finding out not everybody was afraid of their mama like I was because hell nawl!

I will not apologize for the person I will become in that theatre lmao.

I got tricked into eating once. They put it in a puff pastry so I ain’t know what it was until after I took a bite 🥴

Hell nawl

Don’t know the context. But agreed.

There’s a special room in heaven for women bourbon/whiskey drinkers.

Annual reminder that Fall is trash.

Fall is big trash. People tryna rush towards the worst season so they can eat soup and wear a sweater. Turn that AC up and hush lol.

Please keep that alcoholic soup far away from me please and thanks lol.

I guess it’s NOT the thought that counts 🙄 lol

There is no grand secret at how the right is “attracting” these folks. They’re offering no consequences and to coddle them by telling them they don’t have to do or be better. The end. Ppl would rather choose to be shitty because it’s less work and doesn’t require them to do shit different

🤣🤣🤣

I don’t get the fall hype 🙂‍↔️

You’re trapped in a movie with your birthday twin. Who is it and are you surviving?

Idk man, my girls horror movie track record ain’t the greatest. One of the best scenes out of the entire franchise though so 🤷🏽‍♀️

Idk who needs to hear this, but... don't cut your beard off, you probably ugly underneath.

🤨 is that?

It’s bad. Real bad. 😵‍💫