Your pal, Seels

YouTube video by Child of the 80s 1987 - Can't Buy Me Love - Bobby, He Paid Me!!

My favorite New Year’s Eve memory? Oh wow, probably when a fuckin trashed-beyond-belief Cindy Mancini eradicated Ronnie Miller at Big John’s new years bash. youtu.be/gLkF-98h78M?...

The big one out here in San Diego in 1996 was “Hey Caminiti”, a really low hanging fruit effort that was the perfect storm of the Macarena being huge and Ken Caminiti having his MVP season for the Padres around the same time. Rhymed “ribbies” with “city.” It’s bad.

Hey alright, happy to have you here in America’s Finest City!

I do not like it. He looks like Turbo Teen stuck in mid-transformation.

Zack can you please speak on the fact Roy’s character is named Mike Seaver, in 1989 when Growing Painsmania was still running wild all across this land?

God, I HATED Duet… though to be fair, I can’t think of a less-appealing show for a 10 year old to watch.

The theme song is truly terrible (but the same kind of terrible as, like, City of Crime from Dragnet). I feel weirdly energized that someone is talking about this goddamn show in 2025.

God, Open House. What a great pull.

All these similar names but only one Ritch Yarber, baby! One of one!

Oh thank god

The worst part for me is there’s a section of it that sounds like Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch’s “Good Vibrations” so then THAT gets stuck in my head on top of having to hear this other crummy music.

A parking garage pillar indicates that it is Aisle B

Uh, Edwin McCain much?

Oh so you were just spreading that all around, eh? Thought we were sharing a special moment. 😔

“And THEN, then Frank, we put AD into the VCR and, oh no!, realized that you like wrestling more than George Michael! What a shocker! What happened? There was so much wrestling, and I kept hoping the Bluths would pop up and it wouldn't be the end of the eps on that tape. But alas...”

Mortifying.

Remembering in 2005 I lent a VHS tape with some S2 eps of Arrested Development I recorded to this super-pretentious girl I worked with, you know, trying to score some points and… well, tragically it turns out the tape I used also had a bunch of old WWE shows on it. She emailed me the next day:

Hey Dave, not exactly world-ruling but what about when Doom was US President in the 2099 AD run of, uh, 2099?

Oh man, the iconic soundtracks to 7th and 8th grade (my peak).

Larry B, a DoorDash customer, leaves a uhhh great 4 star review for Baskin Robbins “c hey I’ll take this like it is yes I’ve been a food chocolate for a while for a few years but the portions not too bad but she got a little tub that I bought wasn’t fully full movie I would recommend it to a lot of people especially your chocolate the vanilla I love being all about your functional a lot more and while my delivery he was like 10 minutes but if you have the chance to have some ice cream when it is raining”

Shout to Larry B, whose Baskin Robbins DoorDash review sounds like several conversations happening at once. Is this what it’s like in Professor X’s head?

Today we remember the legacy of UnitedHealthcare CEO Brian Thompson

learning that Oprah's real name is Orpah is one of those wedge factoids that will permanently destroy your ability to speak normally about her ever again. it alters your brain chemistry. "Do you mean Orpah?" you'll say, every time. if you're reading this it's already too late

Oh good, it’ll cut down on the confusion when a jolly, white-bearded fat man comes visiting next Saturday.

Cartoon with two panels: Top panel - Drawing of the scene from I Think You Should Leave with the lawyer reading a transcript that says, “BRI: WE NEED TO UNLOAD OUR SHARES BEFORE THEN. VINCENT: I'M ON IT. BRI: BE DISCREET. VINCENT: OF COURSE. BRI: OH MY GOD DID YOU SEE Elon and Kid Rock? VINCENT: OH FuCK. HA-HA-HA-HA. Bottom panel - Elon Musk and Kid Rock looking like fucking assholes at UFC 309

This is a great piece of business

Testing the waters now that more people are here: Is this the type of crowd that wants to see stuff like the smart Gremlin pitching a stay at an affordably priced hotel?

On this Veterans Day, I just want to take a moment and say that I don’t think I’ve ever enjoyed a single moment of Marine veteran Rob Riggle on-screen in anything. I cannot think of anyone less on my comedy frequency. Fuckin guy sucks.

Happy birthday, Mike! Hope it’s a good day.

Just had a cinny raze English muffin this morning and thought of you with every delicious buttery bite.

Because my name is Frank, you see…

Uh ok, let’s talk about it I guess… not sure I have strong opinions either way but if it’s what you want, let’s do it

screenshot of a text convo featuring a picture of a tiny breakfast burrito with machaca. The (hilarious) response to it is “I’ve heard of Manny Machado, but Mini Machaca???” When no laughter comes, a sad “Come on” text is sent.

Can’t believe my own girlfriend fuckin big-timed me on this, the greatest work of my life.