👻 scrEamily J. dEadwards 🧛🏻‍♀️

"it might be conscious but unable to express it! You can't know."
O-kay... That sounds like you are trying to argue for existence of a soul. Why have you never argued this for animals or other objects that didn't have multibillion dollar marketing campaigns?

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If Bluesky is on the express train to TERFtown and all the other platforms are owned by even worse human beings....

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It's not on substack or any other platform. Just little old me. Sending out essays, mostly weekly.

in every single totalitarian state for time immemorial there have been groups of people who are allowed to conditionally break the rules and get away with breaking the rules for a non-specific length of time or in a state-sponsored specific way!

one of the most fascinating things about people coming *back* from the Riyadh Comedy Festival and saying it was a good time is that they cannot comprehend that the people in the audience were probably elite members of society who are *allowed to break the rules*

I don't know where this revisionism has come from about the suffragettes - people saying "if the suffragettes were around today, they'd be considered terrorists."

The suffragettes were arrested and tortured, sexually assaulted and beaten by the state. They *were* considered terrorists!

My sword-and-sorcery story "The Swords and the Crossbow." featuring a warrior woman leading a young seer and a priest through a dangerous landscape filled with treachery, assassins - and oh yeah, zombies - will be published soon by Dirty Magick magazine. The opening lines:

it's a stuffed kiwi bird in a pair of boxer briefs and jelly sandals TO HONOR THE FALLEN

it's so fake the only reason any outlet would ever print it was because their kids were the ones who perpetrated the incredibly fake news story.

(my manager at my BaB absolutely saved me from getting kidnapped by some creeps who kept coming into the store to watch me. his name was Stuart, he was about 50, extremely gay, and was like... EMILY, YOU NEED TO COME WITH ME, hid me in the back, and told them to never come back or else)

you'd stand behind the little littles and kind of watch them and if they struggled and a guardian wasn't helping, you typed for them. this stopped for any kid over the age of... six? seven?

a post from Libs of TikTok that says Employees at a Build-A-Bear refused a request to write Charlie Kirk's name on a bear's birth certificate for a customer

my first job was at BaB and unless things have changed in 25 years... at a store, we only helped kids who *couldn't write* make certificates.

I don't have the largest fashion vocabulary, and I always appreciate your posts because you get me to consider things I am instinctively shocked by.

that red plaid feels extremely McQueen and it made my heart beat a little bit faster

There is no STEM program, no coding boot camp powerful enough to make me anything other than the little girl who saw Shelley Long in Troop Beverly Hills and imprinted on her like a campy baby goose.

my mom made me watch the news every day and I was about 8 when the Rwandan genocide happened and I'm no longer naive enough to think humans *do* anything about genocide but we are, at least, supposed to call it when we see it and that we don't is just crushing my entire chest into a black hole

I hated every single second of THERE WILL BE BLOOD and I hope to never, ever see it ever again. I have never liked a single moment of any of his films. I am so, so relieved to see someone else say this.

It's not a career it's a CALLING

I was born to be an eccentric society-adjacent salon owner who throws checks at all the gay painters who are there to create *~*scandalous~*~ portraiture of me and my friends. Alas.

LAUREN BACALL: you just put your lips together and blow

HUMPHREY BOGART: *holding nintendo cartridge* i know how to get it to work lauren

a close up of andy kaufman in SNL. his hair is slicked down and curly st the ends. he wears a black turtleneck under a light blue oxford shirt under a checked jacket.

every time i try a new product to tame frizzy, curly hair:

and the remote was outside in the rain.

it was a BEAST. we sold it to husband’s brother in law when we moved to CT and i only kind of miss it. i want an old station wagon.

not only was it a manual, not only was i 14, not only was our driveway a hill bordered by a 5’ drop into a ditch on one side, but the porsche didn’t have brakes

i love my weird Car Stories. my dad used to fix up cars to make extra cash. the best was when he asked ~14 year old me to help get a car out of the garage. i declined, so he made my mom do it and a few minutes later, “emmy, come help, your mom drive the porsche into the ditch.” (it was an 80s 924)

a close up of andy kaufman in SNL. his hair is slicked down and curly st the ends. he wears a black turtleneck under a light blue oxford shirt under a checked jacket.

every time i try a new product to tame frizzy, curly hair:

fresh raspberries are a gift from a god i don’t believe in and raspberry flavored seltzer is like drinking rancid nyquil with NONE of the hallucinations i would expect to come along with such an experience.

my idiot ass is over here just wondering if the raspberry flavor tastes like cough syrup. all the polar seltzer red flavors taste like medicine.

the wells fargo wagon would KILL! which seems like the point

um. have any other ideas? asking for a husband

sorry i forgot alt text. betty white in a teal dress saying “a lot of tall girls who couldn’t get dates write poetry in high school”