@chhapiness.bsky.social
Dream Husband. Dad to 2 girls, a raccoon and a sloth. brb, hypnotizing my dog to turn her into a cat
Dads don’t need the A/C, they just pop the collar on their tucked in polos to stay cool
23.06.2025 16:17 — 👍 3 🔁 2 💬 0 📌 0Alexa! Wake me up if there is an emergency like the world has returned back to normal
06.05.2025 21:25 — 👍 7 🔁 3 💬 0 📌 1Just got back from 10YOs last science project fair of the year, and happy to share that since 1st grade utill now there has been a tremendous growth in the effort put in by the parents
16.06.2025 14:05 — 👍 5 🔁 1 💬 0 📌 0My wife still brings up that one time in 2015 I complained of tired legs while she was in labor
12.06.2025 14:21 — 👍 7 🔁 2 💬 0 📌 0A slow cooker shaped phone. Call it a crock a dial
12.06.2025 12:03 — 👍 39 🔁 16 💬 3 📌 3No
12.06.2025 14:16 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0From now on I am telling myself all my skeets have been bangers, the likes just disappeared
12.06.2025 12:53 — 👍 26 🔁 13 💬 2 📌 0Walked my dog past a group of dads at a barbecue, now my dog won’t stop talking about property taxes
30.05.2025 22:18 — 👍 14 🔁 6 💬 0 📌 0It’s not a couch covered in laundry, it’s an art installation titled “couch made of laundry”
29.05.2025 11:12 — 👍 53 🔁 23 💬 4 📌 0I know things ordinary people don't know because ordinary people don't talk to squirrels.
29.05.2025 11:59 — 👍 244 🔁 100 💬 8 📌 0My kids are hooked onto bubble tea. A friend said their kid threw up after trying it at a new place. I am so excited to find that store and take my kids there so they experience that and give up boba tea
29.05.2025 14:12 — 👍 9 🔁 4 💬 0 📌 0Regular coffee comes from beans, expensive coffee from Mercedes beans
23.05.2025 12:50 — 👍 2 🔁 1 💬 1 📌 0Good mor….
22.05.2025 12:31 — 👍 2 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0I’m starting a new game at work, it’s called “if you use the word ‘good’ in the same sentence as the word ‘morning’ you owe me a coffee”
22.05.2025 11:20 — 👍 14 🔁 6 💬 1 📌 0To the world you may mean nothing, but to someone you may mean especially nothing
08.05.2025 15:08 — 👍 20 🔁 7 💬 0 📌 0Alexa! Wake me up if there is an emergency like the world has returned back to normal
06.05.2025 21:25 — 👍 7 🔁 3 💬 0 📌 1If your kid is struggling with constipation or taking a bath what really works for us is asking them to do the dishes, those magic words get them straight to the bathroom
06.05.2025 17:24 — 👍 9 🔁 1 💬 0 📌 0Everytime a child makes a dad joke a Home Depot stud finder proudly beeps
02.05.2025 16:17 — 👍 72 🔁 27 💬 2 📌 0Mine are 🎶 Graze of glory 🎶 and 🎶 who let the cows out moo moo 🎶
14.04.2025 16:46 — 👍 2 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
What’s your favorite track from this festival?
14.04.2025 16:45 — 👍 2 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single: "who wants to go for a walk? who's a good boy?!"
—shih tzu
Please don’t sit next to me…
Please don’t sit next to me…
Please don’t sit next to me…
FUCK!
- me on public transport
Instagram went down today. It’ll stop once it gets married
25.03.2025 21:53 — 👍 13 🔁 7 💬 0 📌 0Deja yay! 😁
17.03.2025 23:58 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Happy Monyay!
10.03.2025 13:43 — 👍 6 🔁 3 💬 1 📌 0there you go! 🤣
10.03.2025 13:42 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0For Lent I am giving up asking permissions from my wife, once she says it’s ok
05.03.2025 20:12 — 👍 7 🔁 3 💬 0 📌 0Every 27th email of the day from the school should include a discount code for couples therapy or a liquor store or both
05.03.2025 00:24 — 👍 43 🔁 14 💬 1 📌 0Teacher: What’s this constellation called?
Brian: Orion
Bryan: Oryan
bought an eggplant, imma grow my own eggs
31.01.2025 19:15 — 👍 32 🔁 11 💬 1 📌 0
