Schadenfreude

Oh, happy chronometric observance! You're divisible by 10 again! Do birthday wzls dream of electric cake? 🎂

My wife and I met a bartender the other night who was holding down FIVE jobs. Seriously, I'm not exaggerating. That's just not right. Something broke good and hard and I think we all know which social class broke it.

rofl.

"Level FOUR improv? My God, they're off the scale! Only three levels of improv were previously known to comedic science!"

"Ladies, gentlemen, enbies, there is only one solution and may God have mercy on us: release Robot Kaiju Drew Carey."

Gentle reminder: EVERYBODY who instructs Bluesky that we Must Never Post in any certain way here will be muteblocked without apology, no matter how much I liked you. Zero exceptions. I will preserve the Old Nanny-Free Internet by any means necessary; that includes those who embrace the Inner Cop.

Just wanted to say goodbye. I muteblock all people who tell other people how to post, and you're no different. It was nice knowing you, though!

OK folks, here's the deal. Spotify is running ICE recruitment ads and has ignored asks to stop. It's time to tell them we won't stream fascism - by cancelling our subscriptions. Here's how to get started: indivisible.org/cancel-spotify

People argue about this? Suspiria is one of my go-to examples of a remake that's totally different from the original but respects it completely. What the hell didn't people like about it?!?

Noroi (The Curse), Banshee Chapter, Barbarian, AM1200, A Wounded Fawn, Sinners, Berberian Sound Studio, Hellbender, Color Out of Space, The Substance, The Menu, Hausu, Vivarium, Masking Threshold, In the Mouth of Madness, Suspiria (both versions), Green Room, The Lighthouse, Cam

How do you feel about wholesome lab environments?

🐭🔬🧑‍🔬❤️

If you see this, quote with a vampire who isn't Dracula.

Colin is my personal hero, role model, and spiritual advisor. He taught me how to exploit the awesome forces of snoo.

Of snoo. *cough*

Anyone? Nobody's curious what snoo is?

I was starting to think I was the only one who'd ever seen it!

Compare and contrast:

techcrunch.com/2025/10/19/k...

www.youtube.com/watch?v=DJkl... [cw: toilet humor; oblique non-explicit references to CSA (as part of a broader satire about privacy)]

Hey new folks! Check out our prestige audio drama "Blood Doll" - a romantic tragedy chronicling the rise (and fall) of a human in the vampire world.

A human who thinks vampires can be better than they think they can. And proves it.

Be careful out there today, mammal friends. Remember that the most ruthlessly subversive thing we can do today is turn up in vast numbers... then mill around peacefully, make a few friends, and go home.

Don't forget they'll be actively trying to ruin this plan.

Don't give them a thing.

what can i do, today, as a private citizen, to tempt you into writing this for eurogamer as a joke?

I'm "spouse."

Your friendly neighborhood changeling is about to face a gauntlet of chirpy ChatGPT-loving toxically-positive extroverts who don't see anything at all wrong with office culture.

Only you can save us. Please help us find a job--so we don't have to become much less weird to survive. 😱

YouTube video by noisepuppet [YTP] Crustal Poopsy Sales Sales Profits Sales

Obligatory media: www.youtube.com/watch?v=f-Zb...

It's perfectly fucked!

Dat gravy ain't wavy.

@moderation.bsky.app Link? 😐

None of the above.

I'm YOUR BEST FRIEND!

Trust me. 🦄🐞🫶

Nobody, in the long and sordid history of human culture, has ever won a non-pyrrhic victory over a cartoon squirrel.

This is how we should be: ruthless in the shadows, ridiculous in the light.

YouTube video by GAKHED Hold my hand, I don't want to lose you in the leaves

The "analog kitten horror" genre is very popular among us changelings, and appropriate for the season.

Brace yourself, it's pretty dark stuff.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=gEIR...

(cw: no actual horror; mildly perplexed kitten; spoopy music and captions; explicit imagery of unwanted pickie-uppies)

That's not the impressive part. How do they all look like *separate* sketch comedy caricatures? Having them all look like Keystone Kops or Young Ones or Spitting Image puppets would have been one thing. This took planning and effort.

Jordan Peterson diagnosed with chronic condition after exposure to mold Peterson's daughter said her father has a "genetic predisposition that causes the immune system to have an inability to identify and detoxify mold."

Clearly this is the work of those Antifa scoundrels.

Heh, maybe the witches did their job like they did with Charlie.

Anyhow, I offer my sincerest nothing to Jordan and his family and I am pleased to do nothing about this. Thoughts and nothing.

www.newsweek.com/jordan-peter...

Oh, we can do better than this.

We make it into a Veritas Project satire and film the "riots" ourselves. In our basements, with gold-painted cardboard props, suits from the local Goodwill, and the lowest production values possible. BLATANTLY fake. But we insist it's all real.

I LOVE kayfabe. 😍

Oops! I almost forgot the mandatory engagement-promoting out-of-context screenshot!

egypt.urnash.com/npol/chapter...

#marketing #earthmoney #engagementishard #help

"More mahoshoujo. More girls kissing. More bunnybutt."

egypt.urnash.com/npol/chapter...

#HowBugDoAMarketing #GiveUsEarthMoney #Friendclown #LikeAndSubscribe #Patreon #PleasePleasePlease

@moderation.bsky.app My patience is wearing real thin here, guys. My bags are packed and they have a little sticker on them that says "Mastodon." Are you going to keep letting this nonsense happen?