Dex Ruth

I know it's early, BUT STILL. If someone had predicted this last year, I wouldn't have just laughed; I would have considered contacting their family out of concern for their mental health and detachment from reality.

Love the guy, he brought us a chip and pride in our city, but be prepared that you be forever undermanned at center and also there will be one other random position where you will have 7-9 guys.

It should be treated like cigarettes. Ban advertising, force disclaimers and warnings, limit access. Tax the hell out of it.

Stools ruined by stools.

Check before sittin'
'Cause people be shittin'

I took a social psych class that had a big section on all the things that casinos do to get people to light their money on fire. Just unbelievably depressing. Like CTE but for bank accounts.

Oh, it's a thing. Key rule when visiting casinos is to always check the chair before sitting. Family friends back home owned a drug store in the city where the first Ontario casino opened. They were busier, but one item skyrocketed severalfold: adult diapers, used by compulsive gamblers.

I agree, the airport is particularly sad, as people in the terminal are frantically lighting their last bits of money on fire before heading home.

I had to go for a conference, checked in late, got up for an early session, and dude from the night before was sitting at the same slot machine, but with a cloud of stink around him, having chosen to shit himself rather than miss a run of luck. The whole place reeks of sadness and desperation.

Unless you're planning on farming, it's Minnesota by a landslide. And, even then, you could still easily farm in Minnesota but have the benefit of having a city and some non-white people around.

I suspect you are feeling the way I felt when Jen's baby had the audacity to be old enough to go to college. Just does not compute.

Speaking of: Giant Baby is now taller than mom, and smoked my ass in a 5k a few weeks ago. It should be illegal for a 12yo to have size 11 feet. 😭

Ah, parenting.

It's like being chained to a table for years at a Humble Pie eating contest that you don't remember ever signing up for, and the organizers won't let you quit.

Cheers to that. When I lived in KS, one of the only dive bars was walking-distance from my apt, so I'd grab a booth and grade while people-watching, and leave when it got too busy so I wasn't costing them business by hogging a booth. Ah, the pre-kid days.

(But, yes, I physically have to get up and leave the room sometimes because it's so on-the-nose with the way it portrays my upbringing. I mean, ffs, my brother has a virtually identical shed and produce stand on the family farm to this day.)

I am absolutely a degen from upcountry but my accent has been filed down after decades down here, and I don't scrap much at all in my old age.

I used to race up stairs in skyscrapers and, without fail, even very fit-looking young people would try to sprint at the start, only to be absolutely cooked ~10 floors in. Basically no roads are as steep as stairs, and ones that are have switchbacks or flat spots to rest.

lunch at sylvia's with al sharpton is the center square on my bingo card

It is so chaotic! Even if you wanted kids to stay in the same camp, they all run in fits and starts throughout the summer. Also, there are almost no options at the very beginning and end of summer.

The fallout of Brexit is just so sad. They are polarized similarly to us, and the Brexiteers won't admit it was a mistake, instead pretending it just wasn't well executed. The same thing will happen here: the tariffs aren't a mistake, it's somehow Obama's fault or someshit.

This highlights the thing: farming is so unattractive that most people have to reach back a generation or two or a friend of a friend to even know someone who's from a farm! (I want to launch the Instagram play farmers into the sun, ngl.)

I moved to a whole new country to get away from the family dairy farm. I've met barely a handful of people since leaving 25 years ago who'd last a day.

Embiid's career is basically winding down at this point, so I'm not sure he matters. Giannis + Maxey would be 🔥🔥🔥

Absolutely, although I don't know who they'd have to give up to get it done. I'd be willing to give up anyone but Scottie, but I think it would have to be two big pieces to make the salaries work. (Not a cap expert, I'm just guessing.)

What's the opposite of a glow up? Because that's what Newsom has been riding hard the past couple of years.

The best part about it is that it's some Wile E Coyote running in mid air before falling action where we've already run off the cliff. Even if he stopped the tariffs tomorrow, the supply chain will be hooped for months. The longer it goes, the worse it will be, but it's already gonna be bad.

It's not hard to see why normal Canadians find them absolutely toxic. Jason Kenney basically lit them on fire before signing off just now. (I cannot stand Kenney, but it shows you just how toxic a lot of the party is.)

You could tell he Poilievre was dying inside trying to pretend that he's not a Trump-humper. His heart just was not in it, lmao.

You could have been watching the Canadian election results roll in instead. Cleansing for the soul.

Certainly the funniest thing to happen since tonight's Jamil Jivani interview.

Yeah, that was epic. Also not hard to see why Canada outside of the incels find these clowns toxic.