Fat Fuck

irish guy dying because he refuses the blood transfusion he needs to survive (the donor is engl*sh 🤢)

if abortion was murder, where tf the ghosts at??

getting so pissed off at my shitty uber driver that i rip his dot off like thanos killing vision

people that watch gore videos are so fucking weird.. bro bush won why are you watching the loser talk about gay ass shit like climate change

got my new bat homies a little bit ago, they're sweet af and absolutely LOVE to take phat leaks

the word soufflé pisses me tf off god i hate the french.

doing magic tricks for the folks in palliative care and turning off their life support if they lack a sense of whimsy and childlike wonderment

if i was jack beanstalk id shove the magic beans up my ass

sit across from a bald guy in my office and the light glare off his dome hurts my eyes

top surgery for a guy with fat tits

drinking leaded milk to own the libs

we've gotta stop saying 'free palestine' if we want to stop israel from taking it

the world would be a better place if livestreams they were jivestreams and it was live feeds of discotheque dance floors

no penis for old ass

gonna make a movie starring exclusively women that fails the bechdel test

just had a dream about a new superman movie starring bj novak and it was so shit i woke up

people back in the day probably didn't give a shit about 'dracula' until they saw their boy Bram Stoker's name on it

they're known for how much they fuck kids: both irl and in fortnite

who the fuck can watch hasan piker and think that he's a well balanced, emotionally sound individual who wouldn't abuse his dog? listen to him open his mouth lmao he's a psycho

dommy mommy theresa

army of darkness for tyler perry enjoyers

bradley cooper has morphed from hollywood heartthrob to jewish buddy holly and it happened in like 2 years tops

people always say magic marker shits are the worst, but you ever had that multi day build up shit where you know after you finally get the ball rolling there's like 1/12 of that bad boy still in the tank and it won't come out?

was watching a Kermit the frog thing and he finally came from that hand up his ass. worlds longest edge session perhaps??

shocking the grey alien about to probe me by pulling a clowns handkerchief out of my asshole for 10 minutes

they wouldn't have killed epstein if he were wearing his iconic 'black girl magic' shirt

being horny to jerk off should be called being fappy

pranking my michevous bunny by replacing their delicious carrot with a stick of dynamite

sex so bad it got a razzie nomination

if i were an evil supervillain id have a moat of starving pigs