Shrimp Fried 🇺🇦

#itsalwayssunny #whatthehellamigonnawatchnow #dayman #championofthesun #thursday

Don't you dare go hollow.

posts not legal, medical or astronomical advice please seek the opinon of a professional all posts valid only in the lower 48 states warranty void where prohibited

When you have cushions but dog does not like cushions

Hazel, an Aussiedor, cuddling a pillow in her likeness.

Y'all ever just cuddle your homunculus? #cuddleyourhomunculus

Heartwarming 🥰

THIS DOESNT WORK IN REAL LIFE

venmo but you send various meats and cheeses

species that has video games but no imsimms because they havent invented air vents

The thing is, this has been going on for 15,000 years. Mammoths walked north america just 5,000 years ago. Birds used to darken the sky. Buffalo the ground. Shoals of fish so numerous you could pluck them out of the water. If we stop it, it will be for the first time in 15,000 years.

as you can see here our officers recovered a bullet featuring a tiny bawdy portrait of my wife addressed to the shooter and signed with lipstick kisses. we are investigating whether this was done via some form of silk screening or if my wife can instead become very small. we have no further comment

@iwriteok.bsky.social how about "Oh my god, we're running behind! Behind the Bastards!"

Recombobulate Document Affinitorials (~60gb, 1 hr)

if society doesn't fit *all* our people, thats actually our societys fucking problem

When you have drivers license but dog does not have drivers license.

[trying to flirt] do you implement IObleterateable?

When you know what thunder is but dog does not know what thunder is

god imagine if we were, as a society, spending all our resources just breeding better fruit and curing diseases instead of doing ahego for billionaires

its hard to express how far apple technology has come in my lifetime

Slipknot, Duality

I don't think he likes that very much

who called it the necromancers guilds and not the megacorpse

What I want to know, with these 'Hey Google, Hey Meta, etc.' vocal prompts with phones. When are we going to be able to pick them?

I want to name my glasses Squibby, and go "Hey Squibbs", as my vocal prompt.

"Cells die and new cells replace them, you can become a completely new human some years down the line"

My dumb ass: "Ahh, so that's why IDs expire"

That's really good actually, you should give that brain of yours a job

"aw yeah, I just nailed that multiple homicide" just isn't a headspace I enjoy physically enacting. Like... kudos to the team doing the animation work (I guess) that it just convincingly looks like murder now. But yeesh. I feel kinda bad/sad just watching it.

IDIOT DOOM SPIRAL - Word on the street is you went around the local hostel telling people that you're a police officer and that it would be *really* fucked up if you shot yourself in the head right in front of them. That's pretty high concept, if you ask me.

INLAND EMPIRE - His corpse is marked by stars.

YOU - What will mine be marked by?

INLAND EMPIRE - Alcohol and heartbreak.

PHYSICAL INSTRUMENT - Your fist clenches suddenly.

YOU - It will be riddled with disco.