I Know What You Did Last Year At Marienbad

What if I just convinced your husband to give another woman a cake that gave her an orgasm

26-YEAR-OLD YOUNG PROFESSIONAL: I’m meeting with a CEO today, I should wear something cute with a blazer and some heels.

VERY IMPORTANT TECH CEO: Today I will dress like if Marty McFly was incapable of feeling passion.

Fine picks for a man his age who dedicated himself to faith. Haven’t got a problem with it.

He looks like he’s about to resign as President of the bank.

Can’t wait for the new Right-Wing Art movement (a “music collective” that never actually produces music because two prominent members get in a fistfight about potential royalty structures)

Can’t wait for the exciting new Right-Wing Art movement (a single photo collage of Secretary of the Interior Doug Burgum which accidentally exposes an ongoing affair with a 15-year-old)

Can’t wait for the exciting new Right-Wing Art movement (two 48-minute iPhone documentaries exposing individual baristas for having Hispanic names)

If Democrats always act the way leftists assume they will act, then the leftists are correct and the person denigrating them is the one acting in bad faith

Proximity to Oasis only increases hate, this is why they’re their own worst haters

There’s a farm nearby where I spent a lot of time growing up. Lovely area.

I also can’t get a meeting with the mayor to ask directly what he believes in, but I don’t feel so entitled to it that I’ll go on TV to complain

Open a couple beers and watch Megalopolis with the right group, it’s a riot

WATCHING ROACHES CLIMB THE WALLS
IF YOU CALLED YOUR DAD, HE COULD STOP IT ALL

No Country For Old Men

Starvation will do that, yes

I don’t imagine Bruce Campbell would like me

How does this even come up twice

They’re gonna run Max Spielberg for senate

I like your kid’s sunglasses

And another thing: I didn’t fail the Turing Test. Please dot put in the New Yorker that I failed the Turing Test.

John Lennon signing an autograph for a fan

I dunno about that, I’m still reading up on his life and I’ve only gotten to about 1980, but it seems like he’s got so much more to do!

He looks like he stole it from someone with an actual beard.

And even then.

Phenomenal song. Don’t want to hear it for another three and a half weeks.

The damnable Irish strike again.

The problem with breakfast is that it’s cringe.

It’s fine to like Hamilton, whatever. I grew up on musicals so that’s how I digest it, and in that respect it’s quite good.

Cuomo will never hire someone who speaks well of the Irish