Blather Wince Repeat

If a vendor wants to refuse Alan Dershowitz a pierogi that’s their pierogitive.

"I'll have what she's having," I say pointing to the corpse.

Nobody has parties anymore but when a self-deprecating inner monologue chips away at the coldest cubes in your tray of awkward, it really does make it less so to just be around yourself

I’ve been panicking all day.

a drawing of a snail with a spiked shell and eyes on his antennae, terrorizing villagers

snel

African Buffalo Bags Millionaire.

It's not even a puzzle or a crowd, you've been trying to fit in with the homeostasis of an app called single cell organism

Is today Ghislaine Maxwell’s spa day or yoga class?

I had always hoped that a desire to live peacefully with each other - to laugh, to love, to learn, to grow as a race - that these would be the unifying factors that might eventually bring mankind together. However, if in the end, it must be a shared, universal hatred of Andrew Cuomo, so be it.

Here is a smiling donkey for you to make your day. That's cute. #bluesky

I need a thicker skin. Maybe one that is naugahyde. Impervious to radiation but something that can still be pierced by sword.

Friday afternoon. Set phasers to chill.

Whenever I get my breast exam I say “beep beep. honk honk. sorry*”

*I wasn’t

Today someone told me, “you’re so effin’ hot! Move over! Don’t touch me!”

Nobody is ever building anything on the moon. Cmon.

Brevity is the soul of wit.
Verbosity is the soul of nitwits.
This is me apologizing.

Dear Lord, you've taken my favorite comedian, Ruth Buzzi, my favorite actor, Val Kilmer, and my favorite singer, Roberta Flack. I just wanted to let you know my favorite politician is Donald Trump.

I just destroyed everyone else in this nursing home’s hacky sack tournament.

If you watch The Wizard Of Oz backwards it's about a girl who escapes a lying oppressor and her subsequent journey to colour blindness.

It's Friday! Have a great weekend everyone.

Tuxedo cats are amazing because they can selectively shed black or white hair depending on the garment they come into contact with.

I don't believe in karma, but sometimes chaos works in our favour, like when billionaires have explosive diarrhea in space.

YouTube video by Nancy Sinatra Nancy Sinatra - These Boots Are Made For Walkin' (Official Music Video)

These #Boots are made for #Walking;
#NancySinatra

#Protests2025
#LadyCrooners
#SKYMUSIC
#FASHION
#MusicVideos

music.youtube.com/watch?v=GM1k...

Diagrams of the mind are what happen when living breathing diagrams project themselves into the mind. Forget about not learning the parts of the mind were you ever to be around any of the actual diagrams and to hell with image search it's too late. Avoid mental illustrators

CLOUD STORAGE A closet with six shelves loaded with white pillow stuffing

Haven’t picked up a man in the wild in years. Do I leave snail trails for them to follow or set a trap?

“The microwave beeps again 1 minute after the cook time ends, perfectly aligning with most microwave meals directing 1 minute to cool after cooking,” I say, watching my blind date fall in love with me.