Kasey Soska

I’m really hoping some tissue company figures out how to market their “stronger than ever box” for killing spiders.

Republicans sure hate when people change their names to align with their gender identity. But have no problem wasting millions to change the name of a government department or a body of water.

How do you say "Yabba dabba doo" in Korean?

The furiously masturbating reanimated creature is Crankenstein’s Monster. Crankenstein is just a dude who jacks it.

You don't really hear about cartoon crossovers anymore. What I wouldn't give for a bunch of my favorites joining together on one VHS to tell me about the dangers of vaping.

The only NFT I’d pay for is a little boomerang of my dog eating pizza crust

I wish our robovac expended the same effort in trying to overturn the dog's water dish as it did getting over the miniscule hump of carpet into our guest room.

Our country may be divided, but we can all agree the best middle of a song is at 2:39 into Sufjan Stevens's "Should Have Known Better." Sorry I won't be taking follow ups.

The most apt comparison for Wicked group choreography are fight scenes in a bad kung fu flick. A litany of shambolic movement distracts you from the fact that no one is actually trying to punch the good guy. Similarly, I couldn't tell you if any individual is singing or where they are in the scene.

It sure would be nice to see a modern movie musical where the choreography for group numbers was more than an inscrutable cacophony of flipping and jumping, and you could discern whether someone was singing or not.

You ever think about who Scooby Doo's favorite character in Jujutsu Kaisen is? You ever think about how it's the year 2025 and we don't have this answer? That's what wrong in America. We don't think about the things we don't think we don't know we think about.

What an amazing tour de force! Oprah (Winfrey) was featured on the covers of O Quarterly, O Magazine, and O Daily! Truly wonderful news for her. Congratulio

If you played Roundball Rock to someone unfamiliar with the NBA on NBC, they’d probably ask what 3DS-era JRPG it was the mini-boss battle music for

I can only assume the recent trend of reduced Pringles sales is in lock with fewer Mega Man games. So weird boys don’t need to put a salty tube on their arm and yell “Get Equipped with Bubble Lead” at family gatherings.

This was a tough year to narrow down my favorite songs. Normally I wouldn't share this many, but these ONE HUNDRED songs are incredible. There's a mix of indie, jazz, pop, country, classical, R&B, punk, rap, funk, metal, and electronic.
Links to Youtube, Spotify, and Apple Music beacons.ai/janus1172

Okay hear me out. What if Biden pardons all of the January 6 participants? They're going to get pardoned anyway and what an absolute petty move. Then invite them all to the White House to have Burger King and Pepsi Zero.

All of these fake alibi posts for Luigi Mangione are so ridiculous and stupid. Especially because on Dec 4 from 6am-6pm I was holding him in my basement “terror room,” subjected to hours of brutal mental torment through drug induced nightmares, then dropped off in Altoona so he could nab a McGriddle

Now that most places don't stamp passports anymore, the only travel log I have is the list of joined WiFi networks.

Oh the memories of connecting to "HeathrowAirport" WiFi...

People that scream about how “the system” squanders taxpayer $$ and ignores what people want have never really tried community organizing, civic engagement, running for office, letter writing, phone campaigns, attending meetings. But post grammatically incorrect screeds on Facebook? Oh hell yeah.

Reason #4521 I'm glad I'm alive now: If it was like the 18th century, my Spotify wrapped would be nothing but that dude Benjamin who owns a fife and hangs out by a fire in the town square.

Kielbasa Washington.

Over the next paragraphs I'll explain why this is funny. Of course, you understand the linguistic phonotactics of Southwestern PA. And are familiar with contemporary jazz collective, West Coast Get Down. We start in 19th century Pittsburgh in the height of Polish immigration...

Espresso but it’s Fight Club:
I’m working late on Marla Singer
The Narrator said not to bring her

What a coup!! Big congrats to Oprah Winfrey for making the cover of this month’s O Magazine!

The self checkout experience:
Please weigh your GREEN BEANS!!!!!!!!!!!! now
Please move your GREEN BEANS!!!!!!! to the bagging area

Are you even in a longterm relationship if you don’t cover up your butthole while going up the stairs so your partner can’t get a finger up there?

Excited for the abrupt switch in January when stores stop playing Christmas music and instead play “World of Ruin” from Final Fantasy 6 on loop