Nicky

“…they’re not gonna take a moment to meditate with a vibrating dishwasher.” -Tressa

“Sometimes I miss when I cared more.” -Alyssa

I know there's a lot of controversy about the Cracker Barrel logo, so I worked up a new option that should be good with everyone... The barrel is back, but it's now guarded by Scubble, The Cracker Goblin. I also worked up a new slogan for the company!

“Kids believe every space is a place to make safe mistakes.” -Clarky

Where’d you hear that

“I got from a white guy named Bruce Wayne, with dreadlocks, who grew weed in Jamaica.” -fatbody

“You can’t hold 10lb chop sticks with one pair of hands.” -fatbody

@swordsalads.bsky.social with the quote

“Couldn’t be a safe word… .com” -@wordsalads

“…I’m sorry I came on your tits then talked about Shrek.” -Anthony Sanders

“Listen, sometimes I scare the hoes by shadow boxing behind the bar.” -mykala

“…and my knees knew no end.” -Mary Beth jr.

“The step between not doing it and doing it is knowing you’re not doing it.” -Cheryl

“I have Itchy Butt Rage, get out my way.” -tom

(This was part of an actual text message I received today lmfaoooo)

“Maybe if you took initiative instead of dildo’s in your ass you’d be farther ahead in life.” -Moe

“You need to meet Terry.”
“Who’s Terry?”
“He’s a guy with a broken leg who couldn’t figure out how to use his scooter while fireworks were going off in the street.” -DRay

“I was going to draw a penis but it wouldn’t have held up to the original” - alicemyslime

“Neurodivergence is the new astrology.” -anonymouse

“A lot of people in this city like to get drunk and bitch, not get drunk and fuck.” -fish

“Not everyone is personally prepared to talk to you about your feet pics, they prefer to purchase the them anonymously on the internet.” -anon

“Bro, I don’t need a Pad Thai from a fuckin Cheesecake Factory.” -chacko

“Meeting you is like finally sitting on the comfy couch.” -Clarkson

“You know when you’re a kid and you fart and someone says ‘smells like someone died.’ Well now when I fart it smells like I’m already dead.” -Brian Posehn

“He smells like an ouroboros dude.” -peyton

“I saw him in the shitter he was knuckled up like rocky dude, both hands ready, Charmin double ply on bofa dem.” -peyton

“Trauma breeds good eyeliner skills.” -Lo

“Whatever let him have his little window dick.” -MelB

“Has anybody, any time, ever seen my phone?” -the worst man in Georgia

*smelling an orange wine* “this smell reminds of the flooded basement of a bookstore or the back corner of a thrift store no one’s been in in a long time.” - @mysteryrodent.bsky.social

“My asshole has more integrity when it takes a shit than your mouth has when you open it to talk to me.” -Cheryl